MC FÜBBment

Higher Power

2012-01-22T11:47:00.000-08:00

He/She/It/Love/Universal Consciousness/DivineIntelligence/Eternal Light/…

God.

Interconnecting, infinitely wise force

that permeates all space,

is beyond time as I conceive it,

is past empirical sense perceptions,

transcends the capability of fully beinggrasped

or explained by the human mind.

A spark of this endless powerful flame

resides within my bodily frame.

My Higher Power is always aware

of every aspect of this spark

that is my soul.

What varies is the degree

to which I am aware

of the presence and characteristics

of God in my life;

my level of spirituality.

Surpassing temporal and spatial realms

as I can conceive them,

it is the closeness

and level of communication

between my soul and Him

that I must seek to develop

using my human mind,

my human brain,

to develop an understanding,

an intimate relationships

that will grow into eternity.

Uphill

2012-01-07T23:40:00.000-08:00

My whole life's been an uphill climb.
Nothing's ever come easy,
and if it did, it was fleeting
memories dissolving like
icing sugar on the tongue,
sweet for a moment then done.

I'm still climbing.

Never felt like I fit in,
now I know it's because I don't
fit into the plan of those who made it,
still striving to walk the path - I feel God's lament
over my detoured ways,
growing impatient
thinking that I need a relocation,
bouncing between bars.

In between bars I spit my truth;
when I write, all I am is light
fighting my way through cobwebs I've let accumulate.
Perhaps there's no direct path to fate.

But if who I am and everything I create is not enough
to "make it"
then I might as well be dead now,
but I'm not.
I must have more left to do and say,
more left to do and say
on this uphill climb.

Substance

2012-01-01T20:23:00.000-08:00

The first thing I'm recording in 2012 is a verse that I'm dropping on a collaborative project that two fellow Toronto hip hop artists are working on - Fenaxiz and royceBIRTH. These are the lyrics:

It really shouldn’t besurprising

with everybody scaredto look inside they focused on what they buying

accepting implicitvalues instead of searching and defining

when you perpetuatethe status quo, what are you defying?

let me break it down

hip hop’s somethingreal, you can embrace it

it’s gotta have somesubstance to it so that you can taste it

content’s consumerism soI’m taking issue

cuz when you’re layingsix feet deep, you can’t take it with you

every time I spit I feelI’m firing off a missile

homing on your heartand I’m praying that it hits you

so you can getawakened to something that is bigger

than this brainwashedlife, got my finger on the trigger

targeting all types,all peoples of all colours

my message is this: Iwant ya’ll to stop killing each other

can’t keep it realwith yourself, how you gonna keep it real with your brother

feeling lost so Iturned to my mother

she said son, let ‘embe, accept ‘em for what they are

save your power forthe battles ahead – you’re going far

try to let go of thepast, though it’s on me like a scar

just ‘cause you gotsome shine don’t make you a star

now I ain’t tryna bethe type to rain on your parade

but just cuz yougetting plays that don’t mean you’ve got it made

from where I’msitting, your whole stees need adjustments

what’s the point ofmusic if it ain’t got substance?

New Music Video: Quality Control

2011-12-19T16:03:00.000-08:00

I collaborated with fellow emcees Crossword and L the 12th Letter on this delightful joint called "Quality Control." The video, download links for the track and more info are below. Enjoy!

Crossword feat. L the 12th Letter and MC FÜBB - Quality Control

WATCH: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1RoybuHd1hk
DOWNLOAD: http://hulkshare.com/vk67avadufi4

@CrosswordMC - @Lthe12thLetter - @MCFUBB

Director: Jason Matos - @jasonmatos

Video Op: Luc Capasso - @CapassoLuc

Producer: CJ Beatz NYC - @CJBeatzNYC

Recorded, mixed & mastered by DJ Mercilless

Quality Control is in full effect
Wack emcees watch out - Crossword, L the 12th Letter and MC FÜBB are on patrol.

TORONTO - In a world full of fakers and wannabes, wack rappers run amok. Luckily, Toronto emcees Crossword, L the 12th Letter and MC FÜBB are on the case, applying Quality Control to offenders of the culture and perpetrators of wackness. In the video for "Quality Control," directed by Jason Matos, the trio roam the T-dot streets in search of the real. They encounter a number of spitters that simply don't make the cut, and combat them with insightful lyrics, provocative flows and passionate deliveries. Wack emcees will be graded, written up, stamped down and aired out, not to mention have their girls taken from them. The moral of the story? Don't be a lame. Crossword, L the 12th Letter and MC FÜBB will call you out on it all day.

Wack Stamp not included.

Teaser Video for 60 Bars (You Ain't Hip Hop)

2011-12-15T23:20:00.000-08:00

Check the teaser video the homie Neil Austen made from the video shoot I did with him and Slick Nick for 60 Bars (You Ain't Hip Hop) off of ITFONA.

Interview: MC FÜBB + The Cypher on CHRW

2011-12-01T21:45:00.001-08:00

"I truly believe that people can transform and overcome the most difficult circumstances, and then transform the environments around them as well. And I believe that because I've done it." -MC FÜBB

I was recently interviewed by Nida Siddiqui for CHRW (University of Western Ontario radio station). You can check out my segment here:

Interview: MC FÜBB + The Cypher on CHRW by mcfubb

Press Release: Toronto 2 Chicago (#TO2CHI)

2011-11-23T20:23:00.001-08:00

[TORONTO 2 CHICAGO DOWNLOAD LINK]

Two days, twonights, two banging tracks. This past summer, Crossword and MCFÜBB (The Cypher, H3/Hip Hop Headz) took a road trip from Toronto toChicago. While the main focus of the trip was to bring Toronto-basedevent The Cypher down to the windy city, the two emcees alsolinked up with studio engineer John Randle at JDRSounds. The first recording session went so well

that FÜBB and Cross cameback the next day to lay out another track. The end result: the Toronto artistsbanged out two joints with Chicago artists they'd never met prior.

The products of their collaborations are unleashed in Toronto 2Chicago (aka #TO2CHI), a hard-hitting double single release thatbridges the distance between artists in the two great cities in the name ofcreating high quality hip hop music. The two track release features Chicagoemcee Cada Bug and Toronto's DJ Nef-You on"Casey Anthony," a high-octane track with a murderous beatproduced by TO's Justunlimited. Producer/emcee ShakeLaBomba rapped on and provided beat for "Not Impressed,”on which all three artists spit diverse flows over a 6/8 timing instrumental(an atypical meter for hip hop music).

In a musicalera where monotony and lacklustre quality are commonplace, Toronto 2Chicago raises the bar by infusing a fresh dose of creativeproduction, original lyricism, distinctive flows and raw hip hop flavour forastute listeners worldwide.

[TORONTO 2 CHICAGO DOWNLOAD LINK]

Artists: Crosswordand MC FÜBB

Project: “Toronto2 Chicago” (#TO2CHI) – Double Single Release

Song 1: “Casey Anthony” feat. Cada Bug (prod. by Justunlimited; cuts by DJNef-You)

Song 2: “Not Impressed” feat. Shake LaBomba (prod. by Shake LaBomba)

Recorded byJohn Randle at JDR Sounds (@JAYRAN20).

Mixed andmastered by Phame at GameTyme Studio (@PhameOne).

Project coverart design by Olivia Allen (@liv_allen).

THE CYPHERTO2CHI Road-Trip Video: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GuG9Yvi8PEg

ArtistInformation:

Crossword: Emcee, band member,journalist, promoter and connector are all titles by which Crossword is known.A lyricist serious with his craft since the age of 13, the Iranian-Canadianentered the scene determined to establish his presence. He began by planningconcerts at landmark Toronto venues such as Lula Lounge, The Drake Hotel, andthe Silver Dollar Room. Having performed alongside Chali 2na and recorded onproduction by Rich Kidd (Drake, Kardinal Offishall, Andreena Mill), P.So TheEarth Tone King (NYC, AOK, 2dopeboyz) and Juno nominee Fresh Kils (D-Sisive,The Extremities), Crossword's career is just taking off. This past September,his band, the Vibonics, released their debut self-titled EP, and he is nowworking on two solo projects - The Eclectic mixtape, andthe Different Light EP.

http://crosswordmusic.com
http://vibonics.com
@CrosswordMC

MC FÜBB: Rapping since the age of15, MC FÜBB (pronounced "emcee foob") began taking his career asa hip hop MC seriously after graduating from the University of Toronto in thespring of 2009. In Sept. 2009 he dropped his debut EP Foundations whichis available for global digital distribution, and followed up with hismixtape Blue Collar Worker in May 2010. He founded a hip hopcommunity called Hip Hop Headz (H3) with which he started theevent THE CYPHER, where MCs/rappers come out to showcase their talents andskills. In combination with his fellow H3 members, THECYPHER has grown to become a staple hip hop event in Toronto, onewhich FÜBB hosts and freestyles at monthly. His first full lengthLP In the Face of No Agreement, a collaboration with Brampton producer Noyz, wasreleased in April 2011 under his self-owned label Revolutionary TimesRecords (RTR). Whether laying down his poetic, intelligent, and intricateverses in the booth or just freestyling in a cypher, MC FÜBB brings alevel of intensity and skill to be reckoned with in the world of hip hop.

http://www.mcfubb.com

http://www.thecypher.ca

http://www.theh3.com

@MCFUBB

Cada Bug: Cycada Alexander,known by the stage name “Cada Bug” is a hip-hop artist born in Chicago, ILand raised in the near west suburb of Bellwood. Born June 10, 1990, Cada Bugbegan rapping at the age of 15 with two other teenagers who formed the groupR.N.C. To date he has recorded over 200 tracks with plenty of hits and 1mixtape! Cada Bug attended Clark Atlanta University for three yearswhere his networking skills were perfected and he got a chance to work withartists from all over the country, underground and mainstream. Now he lives inChicago & has a mixtape appropriately titled "A Bug's Life" withover 25,000 downloads that can be found here ---> http://omg.ly/i9HL

http://www.reverbnation.com/cadabug

http://www.facebook.com/cadabug

@CadaBug

Shake LaBomba: Kelvin"Big Shake LaBomba" Wallace from Bellwood IL. Music producer, songwriter and performer – “passion for the art” is the best way to describe him.The Chicagoland area is big and through that big city Big Shake has coveredmuch ground producing, performing, and killing tracks. In the middle of allthat he put out his first underground LP entitled, "BIG MAN ONCAMPUS," which is a 17 song hip hop musical. “The best has yet to come,”says the big guy as he continues to work with other talented artists as well asdevelop his own work. “More work, more progress is the key.”

http://soundcloud.com/big-shake-labomba

@BIGLABOMBA

For all mediaand booking inquiries, please contact: mcfubb@gmail.com

[TO2CHI Download Link HERE]

###

Honking Horns

2011-11-19T23:18:00.001-08:00

I can’t live today off of yesterday’s truths. I can’tbank a success or a gain from the past and whip it out in the future and hopethat it will be enough. I can’t live my life in what I’ve done and who I’vebeen; sometimes I wish I could, but I can’t.

The world can judge me, respect me, hate me, rejoice withme – it’s all good, and it’s all fleeting. Nobody else has to look at me in themirror or occupy my mind when I try to fall asleep at night. How I view andrelate to myself is of ultimate importance to my own well-being, and most ofthe time I don’t think very highly of who I am.

I frequently occupy a space in my own psyche that I wouldcompare to standing in the middle of an intersection with cars on all sideshonking furiously. They all want me to move, they all want me to go somewhere,most of them issuing conflicting orders and differing directions. Sometimes Ijust sit there and listen to them honk and scream as if to say: “I’m in no hurry…honkall you want, assholes.”

But even that’s a lie. I know time’s limited for all ofus and I could easily depart at any moment. So I have a sense of urgency, asense of foreboding like I need to give all that I can now before I’m gone. Frankly,I don’t think most people walk around with that kind of burden on theirshoulders. I do. Go figure.

So the times that I’m sitting on my ass, watching TV orindulging in some other relatively mindless activity, I feel like I’m lettingthe world down. I’m letting down kids dying in Ethiopia because the world is toogreedy to feed them. I’m letting down addicts who just need someone to showthem a way to recover and give them hope that a new life is possible. I’mletting down my hip hop community because they need artists like me to give itour all and raise the bar of what’s considered good music. Fuck it – I’m notthat noble. I’m mostly just letting myself down because I know I can be betterthan who I’m usually being at any given moment.

The world isn’t honking its horns at me – parts of mybrain are blasting their thoughts around at other parts; at one part inparticular, which I identify as myself.

So I pray. I sit quietly and listen. I write. I rap. AndI hope that what shows up is something that somebody in the world might look atand deem to be something they call, “art.”

Album Review: Ian Kamau - One Day Soon

2011-11-16T14:06:00.000-08:00

“We believe in a gaze that isshorter than our goals/ as empty as our pockets and as stubborn as our souls/ holdingstones, looking for a place for our hands to hide/ standing in a place wheremany took a stand and died/ feet inside the earth, eyes towards the skies/ theland that we live on is the same they occupied/ unsure if our story is ablessing in disguise/ we pray to see the light but we will not open our eyes…”

-Ian Kamau, “Maybe” (track #9 - One Day Soon)

For anyone familiar with Toronto’s hip hop, spoken word, poetry, or musiccommunity in general, Ian Kamau is known by many as a staple artist and pillarof the communities that he represents. Having released several projects in thepast (2 EPs, 3 Mixtapes, 5 Podcasts), Kamau’s latest release and first officialfull length album, One Day Soon, is astrong testament to his creativity, depth of content, and growth as an artistto those who have been following him, and a great introduction for first-timelisteners. It would be quite difficult to fit Ian Kamau or One Day Soon into a specific genre; predominant spoken word and hiphop vibes echo throughout the album, however it might be better to simplycharacterize this LP as soul music.For those seeking an immersive listening experience, something not only to nodyour head to but to absorb and reflect on, OneDay Soon possesses a wealth of Kamau’s accumulated perspectives andpersonal wisdom.

One Day Soon is a heavy and lyrically-packed album attimes, requiring listeners to attune their ears to rapid-fire flows andemotionally charged words and phrases (e.g. track # 12, “Black Bodies,” inwhich Kamau expresses his frustration at the violence and death that plague theblack community). Kamau juxtaposes the faster-paced hip hop songs on the albumwith more mellow tracks on which he spends most of the time singing (e.g. track#8, “Sleeping Giant”), nonetheless still expressing powerful and inspiredideas. In fact, Kamau does a great deal of singing on this album, displayinghis ability to embody different spaces as an artist both vocally and in termsof his role on each track. One Day Soonis a very ambient LP, due not only to his atmospheric production (yes, Kamaualso self-produced the entire album), but largely due to the way Kamau’s smoothbackground vocals compliment his spoken words/raps, which at times can comeacross as a bit monotonous sounding on their own.

This LP is an album of bold statements and complex ideas. The first lineon the album, “I am a new kind of humanbeing” (track #2, “Heading Home”) is a great summary of the kind of thinkerthat this artist is. Kamau is a heavily reflective and philosophical thinker,as evident by the lyrical content of his work. There are times on the albumwhen it seems that Kamau is a full-fledged idealist and dreamer: “we’ll speak our mind, seek and we’ll find/the ties that will bind us, the trees to the vine/ our roots only help us inbeing divine/ and forcing the change we’ll be seeing in time/ and believing insigns that we will overcome” (track #3, “The Village). Even the title ofthe album (One Day Soon) expresses ayearning and hope for a better world and life. It’s clear, however, that Kamauis also a realist and is keenly aware (even at times painfully so) of the harshrealities of the world around him: “blackstakes in the heart/ bullets, like bats, tend to fly after dark/ we make surethe children are home from the park/ a shame - every day, another name todiscuss/ flood the streets with their guns and they blame it on us” (track#12, “Black Bodies”). Kamau’s messages throughout the album are thematicallyfocused on confronting difficult issues in society and uplifting thecommunities around him.

Ian takes responsibility for being the voice of a disenfranchised blackcommunity, the voice of an alienated and uncertain generation facing tumultuouscircumstances. He expresses with sharp words and astute insight the damagingeffects that the history of slavery and cultural displacement have had on blackpeople: “torn from our home/ born in anew world, we’re more than alone/ and the more that we change, more we stay thesame/ sat and prayed at the place that the slave-ships came” (track #3, “TheVillage”). One Day Soon is not simplya recounting of past horrors and there is definitely not a tone of victimhood inKamau’s lyrics; quite contrarily, the artist seems to look with fondness andadmiration at his community, for all of its accomplishments despite their harshconditions. Track #8, “Sleeping Giant,” while targeted towards the blackcommunity, is an inspirational tribute to oppressed communities everywhere: “louder than your empty promise, louder thanyour arms/ louder than your foolish comments, louder than your bombs/ biggerthan your false division, keeping us apart/ louder than your false religionthat warps the truth inside our hearts.” It is perhaps that Kamau hasuncovered his own greatness through his art, despite facing the same obstaclesas the people around him, that he is able to see the greatness in other humanbeings, despite the difficult conditions that they face and even internalize withinthemselves.

While he seems to be focused specifically on problems affecting Toronto’sblack community and the history of people of African descent in general, Kamau’sreflections are universally applicable because the struggles he expresses are,fundamentally, human struggles. On track #13, “Traffic,” Kamau talks about thehuman tendency to go after short-sited goals, fulfill base desires, and run onautopilot whilst neglecting spiritual needs and broader societal issues. Whilethe historical circumstances of his community are specific, the recounting of pastrelationships and stories from his own life make clear that people from allwalks of life deal with similar human conditions. A pervasive theme in Kamau’swriting is a coming to terms with clichés and idealized values that are in contradictionwith life experiences. On track #5, “Now That I’m Alone,” Ian confronts the heartachesof a past romantic relationship that still occupies space in his psyche.Expressing disillusionment with common notions of love, relationships, andromance, he repeatedly sings “I guesslove aint enough” on the chorus, as he recounts the circumstances that ledto the severing of ties with his former romantic partner in his verses. On “Maybe”(track #9), Kamau courageously displays his own vulnerability, fears, and pain,which are evident both in his lyrics, “sooften I sit in places I’d rather not be/ my eyes embrace realities I’d rathernot see/ my angels and my demons, they are constantly warring/ and the things Ido at night often catch me in the morning,” and in the tone of his voice onthe track, which seems quiet and meek in contrast to his resonant voice onother tracks. It’s clear after listening to the song a few times, however, that“Maybe” is perhaps one of the most emotionally touching and lyrically powerfulsongs on the album, largely due to the artist’s honesty and open sharing of hisown self-awareness.

While being a singer, emcee, philosopher, spoken word artist, communityactivist and more, it’s clear that Ian Kamau is a poet at heart, as evidencedby the vividness of his writing and skilled use of language throughout his work.One Day Soon is not only a great workof art, but is incredibly relevant to issues facing modern society and theworld as a whole. What makes Kamau’s work so credible and touching is that he iscoming from a place of both acknowledging and accepting the inequities he seesaround him without condoning them, while at the same time standing for a greaterfuture for himself, the people he knows, and the world around him. For anyonewho believes in building towards a brighter future for the human race in theface of seemingly insurmountable odds, for anyone who is a lover of poetry andgood music, and for anyone who loves art in and of itself, One Day Soon is a must own.

“We’ll never have a renaissance, ‘causewe stand and point our finger, but we’re all confused/ you’ll never have arenaissance, if you say you’re for the people but it’s all for you/ we’ll neverhave a renaissance, ‘cause we say we’ll get together, but it isn’t true/ we’llnever have a renaissance, if we speak about a movement, but refuse to move.”

-Ian Kamau, “Renaissance” (track #16 – One Day Soon)

&lt;p&gt;&amp;amp;amp;amp;lt;p&amp;amp;amp;amp;gt;&amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;lt;p&amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;gt;&amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;lt;p&amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;gt;&amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;lt;p&amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;gt;&amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;lt;p&amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;gt;&amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;lt;p&amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;gt;&amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;lt;p&amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;gt;&amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;lt;p&amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;gt;&amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;lt;a href="http://iankamau.bandcamp.com/album/one-day-soon-lp"&amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;gt;One Day Soon (LP) by Ian Kamau&amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;lt;/a&amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;gt;&amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;lt;/p&amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;gt;&amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;lt;/p&amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;gt;&amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;lt;/p&amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;gt;&amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;lt;/p&amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;gt;&amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;lt;/p&amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;gt;&amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;lt;/p&amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;gt;&amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;lt;/p&amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;gt;&amp;amp;amp;amp;lt;/p&amp;amp;amp;amp;gt;&lt;/p&gt;

Zaidy John

2011-11-06T23:01:00.000-08:00

My Zaidy didn’t have to

read about the Holocaust,

to hear anecdotes,

watch videos,

or sit in a history class.

My Zaidy didn’t “hear about it” fromsomeone

or need to ask what it was

or debate whether or not it happened

and how many died

and “was it really as bad as they say itwas?”

My Zaidy didn’t hear about thebrutality;

my Zaidy was there.

He saw the horror with his own eyes,

heard the screams with his own ears,

smelled the stenches, the fumes, thesmoke…

He told me about lining up after gettingout of

the cattle cars—

about the babies yanked violently

from their mothers’ arms,

the children and elderly to one side,

to their deaths,

himself and the others

into the concentration camps

without consent.

And after the war,

after being liberated from hell onearth,

Zaidy told me how he waited,

how every day he checked the lists,

hoping, yearning, anticipating

the reunion with his family.

But that day never came.

I can only imagine the depression,

the despair and the loneliness

upon realizing that they were all gone,

not knowing if, how, when, or where theydied,

the uncertainty of whether or how

to move on, to start again,

to live.

“I was lucky,”
he told me,

“that I was only in the camp for a year;
some of them were there for two, three years.

I think that’s the reason I survived.”

III

Emaciated,

a grown man,

my Zaidy weighed only fifty-eight pounds

when the British troops arrived at thecamp.

He told me the story

of the man that he and his friend

tried to keep alive,

how they carried him

to see the armies coming through thegates,

only to have him die in his arms

on the day of their liberation.

“Sometimes the past still comes up,”
Zaidy told me.

“It’s a part of me that will never goaway.”

He told me how he got a phone call

about some “restitution money”

that Germany was dispensing to theremaining Survivors.

“A couple thousand dollars

is better than nothing.”

They could give him a million dollars,

they could give all the survivors

all the money in the world,

and it wouldn’t even skim the scars

that the past has left upon them.

I’m grateful

that my Zaidy was courageous enough

to tell me what he went through.

I’m grateful that my grandparents weresurvivors,

that they not only survived

but lived on after their real-lifenightmares.

I’m grateful that they didn’t use goingthrough hell

as an excuse not to create heaven onearth.

And I’m grateful that despite all thelove they lost,

despite the pain of losing their entirefamilies,

the memories, the dreams,

the questions without answers,

I’m grateful that they still love me,

that they still gave and continue togive of themselves,

that they refused to let their pasts

shape who they were in this world

and who they still are to me.

On the Possibility of Peace

2011-11-06T21:39:00.000-08:00

I've spent the past few weeks arguing with many people and debating both sides of the issues surrounding the ongoing conflict in Israel. I have concluded that the blame-game and the right/wrong debate is absolutely useless in this matter, as it often is. There are certain perspectives and interpretations that neither side will likely ever give up.

There needs to be a new type of dialogue being fostered that concerns only the possibility of peace and the things congruent with that possibility. Our way of talking about the issues needs to change before the transformation will take place in reality. It starts with the conversation, and the conversation needs to take on new dimensions to be productive. As Albert Einstein once said: “Problems cannot be solved by the same level of thinking that created them.”

How to foster such a type of conversation in the minds and hearts of those who are filled with hatred seems to be a monumental task, and where to begin this task I do not know. I will start with myself and the way I talk to people. I hope in doing so others will be inspired to do the same.

(January, 2009).

My Response to A World that Hates Israel: Never Again

2011-11-06T21:33:00.000-08:00

As a proud Jew, Zionist, and staunch supporter of the existence of the nation of Israel who is not afraid to voice his opinion, I meet a lot of opposition in this world. Sometimes people are reasonable and willing to talk about things calmly, but most of the time I am met with emotionally charged rhetoric, violent threats, anger, belligerence, and accusations based on hatred and misunderstanding. So here is my best attempt to set the record straight - why I believe in Israel's right to exist in peace and why I defend my position vehemently.

Israel exists so that the Jewish people of the world can have a homeland. There is no other nation in the world that Jews can call their home. Conversely, there are dozens of predominantly Christian, Muslim, Hindu, etc. countries in the world. Throughout the history of the Jewish people, and even before they "became" the Jews (as slaves in Egypt, for example), the Jews have been persecuted and killed. In every generation, in every era, there have been those who sought to destroy the Jewish people and eradicate them from being. This hatred of the Jews (which I refer to as anti-Semitism, for lack of a better term), is irrational, racist, and just as bad as any form of discrimination or prejudice that exists. Furthermore, it is persistent. It has persisted throughout history and continues to persist today.
The Holocaust happened only 60 years ago. This is a relatively recent event in world history - less than a century ago. The world sat back and did nothing while 6 million Jews, not to mention countless other minorities, were exterminated by the Nazis. And the world said "never again."

But the Jewish people have learned from the Holocaust that "never again" means we can never again wait for the world to intervene and come to our aid. Never again can we afford to allow anyone to discriminate against us for being Jews, because passivity breeds tolerance for intolerance, and this only leads to escalations of hatred. Never again will we march like lambs to the slaughter or wait for the hang-men to tighten the nooses around our necks.
And this is why Israel exists: to make sure that the Jews have a way to fight back when those who seek our destruction begin to emerge from the shadows. And since Israel is the metaphorical and material symbol for Jewish unity, strength, and the right to exist, it is also the target of the world's anti-Semites.

Don't get me wrong - I'm not claiming that all who criticize Israel or oppose Israeli policies are racist or anti-Semitic. In fact I think it's the responsibility of all Israeli citizens to scrutinize and criticize their government and its policies. But I am asserting that much of the anti-Israel and anti-Zionist rhetoric in the world, much of the hatred of Israel and its policies are nothing more than veiled anti-Semitism; the same anti-Semitism that has plagued the Jewish people for thousands of years.

To those whose hatred of Israel is motivated by anti-Semitism, I have nothing to say other than that we are here to stay, so you better get used to it. Israel and the Jewish people will never be eliminated, and we will never cease to fight for our God-given rights as human beings; the rights to live, be free, and find peace in the world. I pray that you find some peace in your hearts and realize that your hatred towards us reflects your hatred of your own self, and that you someday overcome this burden.

And to the rest of the world, who hate Israel for every other reason in the book: because of its military campaigns, because of its intolerance of terrorism, because of its refusal to let the death of its people go unnoticed, because of its values, beliefs, and unyielding resolve and commitment to its purpose at any cost, tell me this:

What would you do if you were Israel?

How can you reason with those who deny your right to exist?

How do you create a conversation of peace with those who would rather kill you than accept you?

How can you be diplomatic when every concession you make leads to greater bloodshed?

How would you deall with a world that would rather accuse you of being wrong than work for the common goal of lasting peace?

How can you reason with those who do not utilize the faculty of reason?

I tell you this, world: Israel cannot afford to wait for things to get worse. Israel cannot afford to maintain a status quo of living under constant attack and fear of destruction. Nor should it.

When one's basic rights to life are not being met, one must pursue a dialogue to attain those rights. And where that dialogue is ineffective or impossible, one must pursue legal means to attain those rights. And where the law is too limited, powerless to act, or ineffective itself, the use of force to stand up for one's rights is justified.

This is why I support Israel and will defend that great nation and all it stands for until the day I die. This is why I stand for what I stand for. And I will not kneel before anyone in this matter.

With prayers of peace in Israel and the entire world,

-Daniel Farb
Proud Jew, Zionist, and lover of Israel
(January, 2009)

Dysthymia

2011-11-06T20:24:00.000-08:00

Yellow-gray light
filters through the craggy branches
of a bear locust tree.
Most leaves have decayed completely,
some decompose under the ice and snow.

This isn't the kind of sadness that leaves you;
it hangs around like remorse
for a past mistake that refuses to be silenced.

But like a long-lingering odour in the air,
it can be tolerated
and eventually accepted.

This spiritual condition,
this silly circumstance of my humanity,
I own it and take responsibility for it
completely.

Chicago Roadtrip with THE CYPHER Crew (Hip Hop Headz/H3)

2011-11-02T17:42:00.000-07:00

I went down with some Hip Hop Headz (H3) to Chi-City aka Chi-Town aka The Windy City this past summer to make some music, bring THE CYPHER to Chicago, travel, network, build and have fun. Here is the highlight reel from the trip:

Dear World...

2011-10-28T21:36:00.000-07:00

Dear World,

I know some of youaren’t very happy with me right now. I know over the course of my life I’vepissed a lot of you off. During my brief existence here, I admit, I’ve done somedamage. I could use the excuse of being young and ignorant and confused when I wasa kid, and I think I’d be justified in doing so, but I refuse to use thatexcuse to justify any of my behaviour over the past ten years. G.O.D. knows thatover the past decade I’ve done and said some pretty shitty things. I’ve hurtpeople close to me, I’ve hurt perfect strangers, and I’ve ultimately hurtmyself quite a bit in the process.

This isn’t aconfession. This isn’t an apology. This isn’t a pathetic attempt to get you to sympathizewith me. This, like the purpose of anything I’ve ever written, is me conveying sometruth that I’ve found within myself in the hopes that it makes a difference forthose of you who take the time to read my words.

I know that at times Ican be impatient, crass, and insensitive. I like to think that I possess acertain intensity in my way of being in the world, and I also know that thatway of being can be a double-edged sword. I know I’m sometimes terriblyjudgmental of others and that I’m even harder on myself. I’ve done a lot ofsoul searching; I’ve swallowed some bitter chunks of truth about myselfover the years. Knowing, unfortunately, sometimes makes no difference. I stillchoose to be ways that I know will rub some of you the wrong way, say things thatmight offend you, do things that might anger you.

I also believe thatthere lies an immense potential for greatness in every single human being. Iknow I can be great in the world; I’ve touched my own greatness at times in mylife. What I’ve learned is that there’s some part of me that fights against mydesire to be great in this world – a human ego that resists the loudestcallings of my soul. I believe we all resist certain things about ourselves andthe world and that resistance is the main source of human suffering. Thegreatest pains I’ve experienced in my life have been during the times that I’vefought against my own calling in the world; the times I’ve stood in diametricalopposition to my own self-defined purpose in life. And it’s at those times,dear world, that I’ve done you the most harm.

Heaven and hell arereal – we can manifest them within our own minds and in turn create them hereon earth. Angels and demons exist – I can tell you this because I’ve met peoplewho have embodied the former and I, myself, have been the latter at times in mypast. I didn’t literally sprout horns and carry a pitchfork, and the angels Imet didn’t have wings or halos. What I’m saying is that we all have a fewfundamental choices in this world: we can choose to build or destroy, to createor to dismantle, to grow or decay, to live or to die.

I make no excuse forthe damage I’ve done to any of you, to myself, or to the world as a whole. Ihave remorse, but no regret; I cannot say with any certainty that my life couldhave gone any other way than the way it’s gone thus far. I do believe, however,that my capacity for destruction is equally matched if not surpassed by myability to manifest peace, love, and joy in the world. I believe that everysingle one of you has that power as well.

I’ve created lot in myshort time here. I’ve written hundreds of poems, stories, essays, pieces ofprose…even written you a few letters. I’ve written and recorded songs and putout a few albums. I’ve performed dozens of times to different crowds atdifferent places on the map. I’ve spoken publicly and in private with many toshare my experience, strength, and hope with them. I’ve given of myself tothose who suffer and in the process helped to save some lives. I’ve builtthings. I’ve inspired people. I’ve created love, I’ve spread joy, and I’ve madepeople laugh.

Dear world, please try to understand; sometimes I lose sight of who I am andwhy I’m here. Sometimes I forget what I’m capable of and I sell myself short ofthe power that I have to make a positive difference for others. These are thefacts of my humanity. They don’t condone anything, but I hope they help toexplain.

This life, this world,all of us here in this reality – it’s not about any one of us. Of course we areall myopic in our attention when it comes to our own lives vs. the lives ofothers; we need to possess a certain degree of self-focus and self-awareness tosurvive. What I’m starting to see now,though, what I’m beginning to believe is that all of my choices in life,everything I’ve said and done and everything that I haven’t, have been far moreimportant in terms of the effects they’ve had on the world than theconsequences that they’ve had for me personally. I have no notion of thedegree and scope of the impact that my life has really had so far, nor knowledgeof the difference that my life will ultimately make over the course of time. Ican guess, I can ask people, I can intellectually calculate and search myintuitions, I can look at the quantifiable material differences, but at the endof the day, I have to admit that I just don’t know.

So I make you apromise, world. I will continue to write, I will continue to rap, I willcontinue to speak and perform. I will continue to speak my truth, because that,I believe, is why I’m here. I am committed to inspiring you to find out why you’rehere – to create yourself, your life, your purpose, and manifest the destinythat your soul calls you towards. I promise to be courageous in my efforts inthe face of fear, in the face of my own limitations, and in the face of noagreement from any of you, because I think the world needs more courage. I’mhere to wake you up to your own greatness and to tell you to not let your own humanity be the reason why you don’tpush forward with every ounce of strength you have to be who you truly are andcreate the kind of world that I believe we all want to live in. I’m here toinspire you to work together as one race to transform the world. I will makemistakes; I will learn from them. I will fall down; I will get back up and keepmoving. I will not give up on my dreams until I die.

And if, in the processof me living this life, I hurt you or upset you or piss you off, then Isincerely apologize. It’s not my intention to do you harm. But I will neverapologize for being who I am, for working towards fulfilling my purpose, or foranswering the beckoning of my soul.

This is the path I’vechosen to walk – I refuse to go another way.

Bubbie Ruth

2011-10-28T13:23:00.000-07:00

When I was fourteen years old, my maternal grandmother passed away. I wrote this poem and read it at her funeral as a eulogy...I'm now sharing it with the rest of the world.

Bubbie Ruth

After a Holocaust

towards her andher religion,

my grandmothersuffered

a holocaust

towards herhealth.

She survived atragedy

that most cannotfathom;

she survivedfalling victim

to genocide.

But after thoseyears–

after thosehorrible years–

to me laced withmystery,

a part of herdied.

Whatever hell

she had to livethrough

stripped her ofher childhood.

She was notallowed

to be human

near an age inwhich

I am now learning

who I am.

“We all are puthere by God,”

she told mybrother and I once,

“we all have ourpurpose,

I suppose.

Mine is to tellyou

my history.”

And she told us

how her parentswere sent on trains

to Auswitz.

How she and hersister

were the only twofrom her family

that survived theHolocaust.

How she met mygrandfather,

who had lost hisentire family,

and how the two ofthem,

orphans with nomoney,

started a new life

and created afamily.

Frail as she was,

through her tiredeyes

and shaky hands,

she told us,

“Never forget.

Never forget whoyou are;

you are Jews.”

She would alwaystell

my brothers and I

how big we wereall getting.

Her face wouldlight up

when she saw us,

when she kissed us

and told us wewere good boys.

I never fullyunderstood

why we brought somuch light

to her life,

but now,

as she leaves thisworld,

it’s clear.

It’s more clearthan it’s ever been:

she made sure

that we grew up.

She made sure

that we had thechildhoods

she was nevergiven.

Through thethunderstorms

and incendiarymemories that

burned inside ofher

nearly her entirelife,

through a worldthat took

and took and took

seemingly morethan it gave her,

she fought andlived.

And she gave backto this world.

She gave way toseven lives,

and filled thoselives

with her love.

In these timeswhen no words

can fill the holes

that death leavesbehind,

I look to goodmemories.

I look to thepictures

of smiling faces;

the picture of agrandmother

proudly holdingher grandson

in her arms.

And on this day

when I havenothing

but memories andburning questions,

I will remember alife

that wasn’t glamorous,

a life that couldhave happened

a million otherways,

but mostimportantly,

a grandmother wholoved me

and a soul who isfinally free.

Album Review: MC FÜBB - In the Face of No Agreement (by Andy Carrington)

2011-10-26T20:48:00.000-07:00

"Here be a hungry, intelligent and creatively-gifted man, whose album thrives on the strength of his beat riding, confident vocal tone and range of subject matter, all of which become a warming familiarity early on." -Andy Carrington (andycarrington.co.uk)

Peep the review written by Andy Carrington over in the UK on my most recent album, In the Face of No Agreement. 4.5 stars out of 5? I'm humbled, sir! Click the image below to read:

Dark Jazz (verse)

2011-10-20T10:29:00.000-07:00

Check this video of me spitting a verse that's gonna be on my homie Noyz's upcoming album Degrees of Freedom. Video courtesy of Slick Nick (aka Telesca Photography):

Choice

2011-10-17T22:47:00.000-07:00

Life doesn’t always let us choose ourcircumstances.

We must all experience things

that we may not want to face at the time.

Every child’s life is made real

by knowledge of death.

Everyone feels lonely,

or angry,

or ashamed

sometimes.

All girls must face

their first menstrual cycle;

boys must face

wet dreams.

We all must travel

through this incomprehensible

thing we call life,

but we need not travel alone.

Therein lies choice

in a seemingly unchangeable

mesh of lives.

My Brand of Poetry

2011-10-12T22:04:00.000-07:00

That’s the thing about me though –

I don’t really write the way I’m supposed to write.

Academics probably can’t scan my work so easily

and find cohesive narratives or

thematic categories to file my poetry into.

A poet really isn’t supposed to write about poetry

let alone explain what he writes while he’s writing it

to the reader as he tries to figure out if this is a joke

or something different I should pay attention to

or put it down because I can’t figure it out.

There’s nothing to figure out.

Poetry should make you feel something.

Sometimes it’s all those cliché things we think it is

when we think about poetry like watery streams andtear-drops

and snowflakes and sunsets and relationships

and sometimes it’s a jagged piece of wood running acrossyour shoulder-blade.

Try to understand, for me it’s not really conscious

or even stream-of-consciousness but something completely

alien to ordinary life,

and because of that more true to real life as Iexperience it.

Here:

It’s the glance you exchange with the person in thecoffee shop,

the one you see and who sees you and who you don’t talkto

but are flooded with an impression of a thousand thoughts

and feelings and smells and characters

for a brief moment in time as you fiddle in your pocketfor change

and wonder something about them,

all the while trying to look normal.

That’s poetry – it’s the magic of the ordinary.

All the rest is far too academic and intellectual

to even come close to touching its essence.

DEMON

2011-10-12T00:42:00.000-07:00

Thehorned humanoid creature walked naked and alone in the dark cold woods. He hadtread through this same forest several times before and every time he walked,he walked alone. He had no family and no friends - only enemies. The only allyhe knew was the primal instinct he possessed within himself that told him tosurvive.

Hispurpose on the earth was unknown, even by the creature himself. The only thing heknew was that he was different from normalpeople, which made him a constant target of prejudice, malice, and hate.

Thecold wind blew dead leaves around him in all directions. The creature snarledslightly as a small cyclone of leaves passed by and brushed his scaly leg. Themoonlight glimmered through the small cracks of space between the leaves in thetrees and shone on his blackened eyes, every so often. His jagged teethclenched tightly, his decrepit toe nails dragging in the dirt with each step,he walked on.

“Demon…demon…”he muttered to himself. Demon was the name that he had been given by the peopleof the world. Everywhere he went, he was shunned, chased, attacked, and calledby the same name. “Demon, demon, demon…” he continued to chant to himself, “Iam Demon.”

Demoncame to a small clearing in the woods. A shallow pond surrounded by bulrushesand tall grass lay in the middle of the clearing, reflecting the whitemoonlight off of its smooth surface. There was a large, flat rock in theshadows, under some trees beside the pond. He cautiously stepped forwardtowards the pond, making sure that there was nobody else around. He knelt downonto his knees at the edge of the pond and, after quickly glancing around again,submerged his head in the cool water and opened his monstrous mouth.

Hefilled his mouth with the cool, refreshing water and then lifted his head backup into the air. He shook his head furiously for a few seconds, sprayingdroplets of water around him in all directions. Slowly getting back to hisfeet, his stomach growled. He hadn’t eaten in over three days, and his stomachfelt as if it were a pit of rotting, quivering flesh. He quickly grabbed ahandful of leaves from a nearby tree and shoved them into his mouth, chewedonce, and spit them out in disgust.

“ROOAAARRRRRRR!”growled Demon as he looked to the sky in anger. Birds flustered and scatteredout of all the trees around him. He breathed heavily for a few moments, tryingto calm himself down. Slowly, he walked over to the large rock beside the pondand sat down.

Astrenuous expression covered Demon’s face. His pain could be seen under hisrough, red-scaled skin, behind his black eyes and in the deep ridges ofwrinkles on his forehead. He was a creature who did not belong in the world; anentity with no place amongst the species of his realm. His entire life was spentas a fugitive, running from hunters and living in the wilderness, alone.

Unfortunately,Demon’s pain was more deep rooted than that of a ridiculed outcast. For as muchas he wanted to be a part of society, there was a greater part of him which wasconsumed by rage. The creature not only had the exterior appearance of evil,but his soul was impure; tainted from the moment of his creation. His hatred ofmankind was so deep rooted that he was created with a sense of loathing for allthose around him.

Throughall his evil, Demon still had a glimmer of his creator in him. He didn’tbelieve in God, but he knew inside himself that behind all his hate, lonelinessand contempt, that there was something more to his existence. Something hewould never openly admit, which wasn’t very hard for Demon, because he hadnobody to talk to. Some inexplicable force which forced him to keep on living resonatedfrom some part of his being, deep under layers of pain and despair. Currently, Demonwondered and pondered, frantically creating hypothetical reasons; rationalesthat could possibly describe or explain why he existed at all.

“Whenwill it end?” he asked himself. He looked to stars and then quickly shifted hisgaze over to the moon and hollered, in his raspy, thunderous voice, “When do Iget to die?”

“Whywould you want to die?” inquired a quiet, timid voice from the path behind him.Demon jumped to his feet suddenly and raised his red, muscular arms, ready toattack. A small boy let out a yelp and fell to the ground, staring up in terrorat the creature which towered before him. Demon snarled and drooled, revealinghis razor sharp teeth.

“Please…pleasedon’t hurt me!” pleaded the boy in horror. Demon stared at him quizzically fora few moments, shifting his head from side to side, analyzing. After he decidedthe boy was of no threat, nor even enough for a snack, he slowly lowered hisarms and got out of his fighting stance. His black eyes stared deep into thebrown eyes of the small boy, who was still on the ground shaking.

“You’reall skin and bones,” said Demon, “you’re not even worth slaughtering to eat.”Relieved slightly, the boy stopped shaking and slowly got to his feet. He stoodonly a few meters away from the huge creature, staring up at him in awe withhis mouth wide open. “Get out of here,” commanded Demon in resentment, “go backto your…village.” Demon turned away and went back to the rock to sit down.

“Iran away,” said the boy in a squeaky, innocent voice. Demon stopped in histracks, turned around, and snarled at the boy.

“Idon’t care if you flew away from whatever forsaken place you’re from!” boomedthe creature. The boy stepped back a bit, frightened. “Now go home and leave mealone,” reiterated the creature. Demon stomped back over to the rock and dumpedhimself on it in exhaustion. He lay down and closed his eyes, but could stillsmell the boy near him. The small, congested nostrils on Demon’s face flaredheavily for a few moments. “You have food! Give it to me!” barked the creatureas he opened his red eyes and sat up. The small, freckle-faced boy stood motionless,staring at the monster before him. Demon let out a low snarl as his piercing,fiery eyes stared into the back of the boy’s skull.

“I…Ionly have a little bit left,” said the boy in trepidation. He reached into hispocket and pulled out some salt-cured pieces of meat wrapped in paper. Demonjumped up suddenly and snatched the meat out of the child’s hand. “Hey, stop!”screamed the boy in desperation as he watched what was left of his food bedevoured by the carnivore before him. Tears began to form in the boy’s eyes.

“You’recrying?” exclaimed Demon in a mocking tone. The boy now began to weepuncontrollably, staring at his the holes in his shoes. “Sickening, putridcreature,” said Demon as he sat himself back down on the rock. The boycontinued to cry for a few more seconds, then looked up at Demon in resentmentand anger.

“Nowonder everybody wants you dead!” hollered the boy. Demon sat on the rock withhis eyes closed, unmoved by the boy’s words. The boy took a few steps closer tothe rock. “I hate you!” he screamed. Demon opened his eyes and turned his neckslowly, meeting the child’s cold gaze.

“Youdon’t know what hate is,” proclaimed the creature.

“YesI do!” replied the boy. “Everybody hates me. The other kids call me names andspit on me while my own brother’s just watch and laugh. My father does nothingbut yell at me and beat me. And my mother…my mother is dead.” Demon shook hishead slowly in a sense of disbelief.

“Doyou have any idea who you are talking to?” asked Demon. “I am the most hatedcreature in the universe! The most feared…the most loathed and hunted of any inexistence. I am the epitome of your anguish; the very image of the evil andmalevolence of your entire race!” The boy stared at him in confusion. “Stupidboy! You talk about the other kidsand your…family. While I am the onlyone of my kind in the entire world!” explained Demon. “You are too young andignorant to understand.”

Demonand the boy remained locked in each others’ eyes for several moments, and thechild wiped away what tears were left on his face. This was the only humancontact that Demon had ever engaged in without being attacked or hunted. It wasalso the only contact the small boy had ever had in which someone had actuallytaken the time to listen to him.

“Begone from this place,” ordered Demon, “go back to your people. Leave me alonewith my pain.” Again the creature closed his eyes and lay back on the rock.

“Whatis your name?” asked the boy.

“Iam Demon,” replied the creature.

“Butwhat is your real name?” asked the boy again. “I’m Jacob.”

“Ihave no name other than that given to me by your insidious race,” explainedDemon, and then repeated, “I am Demon.”

Jacobturned away from the creature for the first time in their encounter and walkedtowards the edge of the pond. He picked up a small, flat stone and attempted toskip it across the water. The stone hit the water once and sunk to thebottom. He washed his small, nimblehands in the water and shook them off in the air. Turning his attention back toDemon, he noticed many bloody gashes on the creature’s legs and chest.

“Doesit hurt?” inquired Jacob.

“Ha!”snorted Demon.

“You’rebleeding,” said Jacob.

“Iam always bleeding,” replied Demon.

Jacob,overcome with innocent curiosity, walked back over towards Demon and stretchedout his bony arm to touch the creature’s rough, scaly skin. Demon opened hiseyes suddenly, instinctively grabbed Jacob’s arm firmly and, not knowing hisown strength, snapped the boy’s fragile bones.

“Aaaaahhhhhhh!”wailed the boy in agony.

Inthat moment, something changed inside of Demon’s mind. It was a feeling he hadnever felt before; like tasting a foreign food that he had never known existed.In that split second of a moment, there was a new reality to Demon’s existence.A wave of energy seemed to flow through his entire body, emanating from hishand which clasped the child’s broken arm. For the first time in his life,Demon felt sympathy and compassion. He quickly let go of Jacob’s arm. The boy fell to the ground, clasping his armand moaning in pain.

“I’msorry,” said Demon, “I…I didn’t mean to harm you.”

“Ithurts!” the boy screamed. “It’s too much…it’s…it’s more than I can take! OhGod, it hurts!” Demon took a step toward the boy, reaching his out with hisred, muscular hand. The boy recoiled and squirmed back in terror.

“No!”pleaded Jacob. “Please, don’t hurt me again!”

“I’mtrying to help you,” informed Demon, again reaching toward the boy.

“No!”yelled Jacob, curling into a fetal position. “I don’t believe you.”

Demonwas overcome with emotion. He had never known he was capable of feelinganything at all, besides anger, fear, and loneliness. In the short time he hadencountered this human boy, he had discovered parts of himself that he hadnever even fathomed could exist. He felt compelled to help the boy.

“Iam going to help you,” proclaimed Demon, “do not resist me.” The boy lay on theground, shaking in fear, unable to struggle anymore. Demon rolled Jacob ontohis back and analyzed the boy’s mangled arm. He stared at the deformed arm, hisglowing, red eyes taking in more than they ever had before. It was as if ineach second that he stared at the injury, he gained more knowledge, wisdom and insightthan he could comprehend. The immense pain which had throbbed in Demon’s head throughouthis entire life seemed to be pulsating, and each pulse provided his mind withnew truths; fresh realizations that made his entire existence to this pointseem irrelevant. He couldn’t begin to understand why or what was happening, buthe somehow knew what he had to do.

“Iknown how to help you,” assured Demon. The boy lay whimpering on the dirt,hoping his pain would soon be alleviated. Demon reached forward and rested hisblistered fingers on the child’s fractured arm. He closed his eyes.

Whitelight began to glow from deep within Demon’s hand, piercing through his veins.His mouth and eyes suddenly opened wide, his face raised toward the moonlight.The creature’s neck was stuck in place; his entire body rigid and unable tomove. Demon’s shiny, opal eyes turned to a pale shade of pink. The white lightin his hand began to glow more brightly, covering the entire clearing andforcing Jacob to close his eyes.

Afeeling of warmth flowed throughout Demon’s body. Miraculously, the brokenbones in Jacob’s arms began to readjust themselves and reconnect within hisarm.

“It’sso warm,” whispered the boy in awe, “so warm.”

Thelight moved away from Demon’s hand and began to travel towards his black heart.Demon fell back with immense force, as if he had been hit by a car, and flewinto the pond, splashing water in all directions. Jacob opened his eyes and gotto his feet slowly, stroking his healed arm. He stood in a state ofbewilderment and stared at the light which seemed to shine upward from thecenter of the pond into the infinity of the night sky.

Demon’sbody slowly appeared at the surface of the water, levitating up as if he washarnessed at the waist by the light. His legs and arms dangled down, his headraised toward the sky. Jacob’s eyes remained wide open in shock as he raisedhis head to look up at the creature rising above him. Demon stared up at thewhite light, his mouth still agape, and the shade of his eyes changing frompink to blue, and suddenly stopped rising.

Hisskin began to crack. Across the creature’s chest, his shoulders, his face andhis back, white light beamed out in magnificent rays, illuminating the entireforest for miles. Within a few seconds, white light exploded from inside thecreature, and his demonic physical form was no more. The entire forest wascovered with utter whiteness and nothing could be seen for a several seconds.As quickly as the light had exploded from within Demon’s heart, the lightvanished, and darkness again covered the night.

Jacobopened his eyes just in time to see another small boy plummeting toward thepond from the space in which Demon had just been. The boy crashed through thesurface of the water and Jacob ran into the pond. He dove under the surface,reached out, and grabbed a small hand. He kicked and pulled with all of hismight, bringing himself and the other boy to the surface. Jacob swam over tothe edge of the pond and dragged the boy onto the dirt.

Jacobgot up and stared down and the curly haired child who lay on the ground,coughing up water. The boy stopped coughing and opened his blue eyes, staring upat Jacob. Jacob helped the boy get to his feet and the two stood in front ofeach other at equal height, gazing into each others’ eyes.

“I’mJacob,” said Jacob, abruptly.

“I’mAndrew,” said the boy shyly, “will you be my friend?” Jacob smiled and took theAndrew’s hand. The two of them walked down the path, following the moonlightback to the village, together.

Somewherefar away, in another land, in the middle of another forest, a Demon appeared;cold, naked, and alone.

Words from the Philosopher MC: On choosing to fall to victim to circumstance…

2011-10-11T10:45:00.000-07:00

Circumstancesare the “what’s so” of life. Circumstances simply are what they are, much inthe empirical sense that a brick is simply a brick. All entailments as to themeaning of a given circumstance or set of circumstances are human attributions,and therefore such interpretations are as arbitrary as the subjective lensthrough which they are viewed. People who use circumstances as reasons fortheir action or inaction are actually limiting their freedom to make their ownchoices. It is only when one is free from all attributions as to the meaningsof one’s circumstances that one is free to really choose.

Example: There is a hip hop eventgoing on that Tom would like to go to, but he ends up not going “because it’stoo cold outside.” In this case, Tom have fallen victim to his circumstanceinasmuch as he let it dictate his actions. It’s clear from this example thatthe cold weather is not at the source of the reason for Tom’s action orinaction. Rather, he would be being more honest and accurate if he said “Ididn’t go the event because I chose to use the cold weather as an excuse not togo.” Had Tom actually made the choice to go to the event, the circumstance ofthe cold weather would have remained the same, but he would have actually donewhat he wanted to do. Ergo, had Tom chosen to go to the eventdespite the cold weather, he would have not fallen victim to the circumstance.

Caveat: There are such things asreal victims in the world, and therefore it is possible to be a victim tocircumstance without choosing it. For example, had Tom been walking down thestreet and randomly gunned down by a raving lunatic, this would be acircumstance that prevented Tom from getting to the event without his choosing.In essence, a real victim is one who has had their freedom to choose forcefully taken fromthem.

Bite My Tongue

2011-10-10T22:43:00.000-07:00

gave up on the goal of living comfortably

as I saw the floor cave out from under me

wondering when these demons will come for me,

waiting placidly

for the world that’s coming after me;

how will I harbour it?

standing with crooked legs on the ledge far from the edge

of the jumping off point – I’ve already been there

and can’t go back again,

because if I go back again, I won’t come back again;

this is already my second chance

I already put my soul on paper – they don’t read it

put my soul on tracks – they won’t hear it

but for the few that do, I’m eternally grateful.

I turn to G.O.D., I’m told to enjoy the storm

because when there’s calm it won’t last

and even then I’ll be bored with it,

I know it’s true, but this anxiety, I won’t forfeit it

it gives me motivation to make moves without hesitation

because stagnation is the same as death for me.

I won’t atone for my complexity.

I believe that both heaven and hell are kept in me,

kept it we,

as we circumnavigate the seasons

we think our reasons give us the course that we’ll take,

more like karma equals destiny, we have to master ourfates

because the only thing carved in stone

in a word that’s been carved in stone, and even that canbreak.

forgive me, world, I can’t procrastinate

and if I hurt your ego in process, then good,

and if your feelings get the better of you, then I’msorry,

but I wasn’t put here to be beneath anyone or anything

except the vision that I have defined

as my purpose to bequeath upon those yet to come

and as such,

I refuse to hold back or to bite my tongue

Album Review: The Antiheroes – this is freeDUMB

2011-10-10T11:06:00.000-07:00

Easilyone of the most talented and fresh-sounding duos in the world of rap, The Antiheroes’ (Sha Prince and Flex) debut LP, this is freeDUMB, is both musically a great contribution to hip hop and apowerful criticism of modern society and culture. Throughout the album, the twoMCs not only point out the obscenities that they perceive around them, both inregards to the hip hop scene and the world at large, but they also poignantlyexpress their own internal dialogues and struggles they face as artists andhuman beings. Most importantly, Flex and Sha are lyrically able to accomplishtheir thematic goals without sounding corny or repetitive. Each track on thisalbum sounds like its own distinct single and evokes different emotions in thelistener, despite producer MMac producing 8 of the 17 tracks (a testament tothe beat-maker’s versatility and creativity). this is freeDUMB is an album not only for those who love highquality hip hop music, but even moreso for those who love and appreciate stronglyricism that touches on deep concepts and complex issues.

Thealbum opens with an eloquent and heartfelt verse by Flex over a lovelysynthetic organ-laden beat by MMac and sharp cuts by DJ Docta. Flex, throughbar-filled flows and with an ear-pleasing, mid-high frequency arioso tone, rapsabout his frustrations in facing obstacles to success as an artist. What ringsthrough loud and clear though is not cynicism in Flex’s verse, but rather apassionate commitment to succeed (and with these kinds of lyrics, it’d be adamn shame if he doesn’t): “I’m socommitted to living within an image of doing whatever’s fitting/ for me to bein position to give ‘em what they were missing.” Flex also speaks on avalue that both he and Sha seem to hold dear to their art when he spits: “honestly is my honesty necessary to blow?/is selling your soul the recipe? I was hoping it’s no.” It’s clear fromlistening to this is freeDUMB a fewtimes that The Antiheroes are not willing to compromise their content or dumb-downtheir self-expressions in order to make music that may be more commerciallyviable or marketable to the masses. That’s not to say that this is freeDUMB isn’t commercially viable; if anything one of thereasons the quality of their work is so strong is that these artists don’tsettle for less than raw authenticity in their music. On the same title track,Sha Prince (bringing a sharp delivery, and on-point intricate flows to thetable) reflects on his own self-doubts and personal life choices, which heworries may contain an opportunity cost that doesn’t add up in his favour: “life – I never rush it/ I’m rolling with mypunches/ maybe I slow it too much and now I’m running lunges” and “being a rap-star isn’t in my best interest.”Undoubtedly, Sha echoes the same hunger and passion in his verse as Flex does,firing off intense and ferocious flows: “ina verse, on a record, some may say he talk reckless/ but never give a damn,since a kid my mind rebellious/ and I eat these rappers’ lunch, dinner,breakfast on a tracklist/ only spitting two years, word almost perfected.” For a rapper only spitting for twoyears, Sha Prince displays a lot more talent and skill than many who have beenin the game for a decade.

JonDubbs supplies a rock-symphonic instrumental on the second track, Become Alive, complete with guitar riffsand violin melodies on the chorus. Flex and Sha articulate their internalconflicts on this track perhaps better than any other on the album. Sha Princein particular, never a stranger to expressing brutally honest and at times evenextreme thoughts on wax, goes in on his conflicting desires for wealth andmaterial success in contradiction to staying true to his own values andprinciples: “living lavish was never mygoal/ ‘till my hunger rose, belly ache, winter froze/ lights dim, looking at mysituation inside impatient eyes/ temptation is now my best friend/ worst enemy,lord seek the remedy/ lead me on the right path before my body doesn’t breathe.”Sha’s erratic flows on this track excellently compliment the frantic nature ofthe opposing thoughts being vented on this track.

Circus Clowns (track #3), another engrossing production by MMacwith DJ Docta cuts, is a poetically infused track in which The Antiheroesattack the rap scene which they perceive as becoming little more than a “circusof clowns.” Sha and Flex stake their claim as MCs to be reckoned with on thistrack and confidently announce their goal to elevate the standards of what isdeemed to be acceptable, quality rap music (also check the remix on the album’sfinal track).

Fly (track #5) is aninspirational track with captivating samples by producer Jay Emess aboutfinding motivation and self-empowerment by being grateful and focusing onliving out dreams in order to elevate over current circumstances.

There’sa slew of talented features on the album. Soulful songstress Tamsynn Leeblesses track #4, Masquerade, (as well as track #9, All Alone) which is a song that digsbelow the surface to reveal the underlying causes of unfortunate lifecircumstances that have become all too commonplace in the world. Prolific DurhamRegion rapper Daxflow makes an appearance on Everyday (track #6, produced by Beatwyze, DJ Docta again on the cuts)on which he vents his anger about his abusive, selfish, irresponsible absenteefather, while Sha Prince speaks on the painful experiences of his past that hekept inside and Flex reveals that expressing himself via writing and rappinghas been vital to his existence: “what’s living if I’m within a prison built upinside?/ if it wasn’t written, I’d never find a will to survive.” Everyday is an especially insightfultrack as each of the lyricists describe in their own way (whether explicitly orotherwise) how hip hop, via writing and rapping (i.e. being emcees), has giventhem the ability to stay sane and live productive, meaningful lives despite thetrying circumstances they faced growing up. The Rebels (Listen Up) (track #7) is one of the heaviest hitting bangers on the album, thanksin part to the banging beat produced by up-and-coming Toronto producer RichKidd. This track is definitely an attention grabber (evident in the title ofthe track), with high-impact lyrics, punchy deliveries from both Sha and Flex,and complete with a feature from the always entertaining D-Sisive: “fuck you,your momma and your cousin too/ your momma’s gay husband’s uncle’s brother, andhis cousin too” (yes D…you got our attention...).

Singer Emerson Brooks(recently signed to Atlantic Records) provides a unique hook on Where to Begin (track #12), a song aboutrelationship troubles and past relationships. Kenny Cee, another skilledvocalist, sings the chorus on Given Up OnMe (track #13), a track produced by Khz with a sample that sounds eerilysimilar to Zepplin’s Stairway to Heaven.Flex and Sha Prince complement each other very elegantly on this track, withFlex delivering a calmer, more melodic verse with reflective and wellcontextualized lyrics about his past, whereas Sha raps with a much harsher toneand abrasive cadences, which match the animated and harsh content on hisretrospective verse. Gospel-style R&B singer Mike Devine compliments track#16, Morning, with his passionate andambient voice. The beat on this track, produced by Graffic, is probably thecalmest and most laid-back beat on the album, which evidently doesn’t suit TheAntiheroes style very well, unfortunately – both Sha and Flex sound a bit harshover this track, which could have benefited either by them toning down theirdeliveries a bit or by a smoother vocal mixing by the engineer.

The Antiheroes give a vividly dispellingtreatment to the dirty underbelly of the “Hollywood lifestyle” of entertainmenton Hollywood (track #10), produced bytriple-threat artist Relic. One of my personal favourites on the entire album(which is hard to say, given how dope the entire project is) is the track OJ Gloves (track #11). There’s somethingvery serious and polished about Sha’s tone and delivery on this track, showingthat even when he simplifies his flows he can still spit hard and impress withthe best of them. Flex also comes correct and on point on OJ Gloves, at times with flows reminiscent of Big Pun (with aclearer voice and less laboured reathing). Lyrically, both emcees prove how brightthey can shine in this song (albeit each in their own way), Sha with his clevervulgarity, “laughing, like my first name Freddy dude/ last name Kruger butfilthier than a prostitute/ not on my level – never reach my altitude/ fingerhurt from skipping your tracks like they was interludes,” and Flex with his intellectualsuperiority, “I take it some of you followers swallow what you were fed/ youwallow within your own – I’m stepping over your head.” Track #15, Of the Night, is definitely a hidden gemon this album, with The Antiheroes coming raw with flows that remind thelistener of classic Planet Asia verses and lyrics that evoke the feelings ofdark alleyways and late nights with shady characters in the wrong part of town.MMac again supplies an excellently produced instrumental for this song that evokesmemories of Pharaohe Monch’s InternalAffairs album.

There’s an overarching soundon this is freeDUMB that can best bedescribed as a romantic requiem in response to a dead and pure form of hip hopthat has been lost over the years. In a broader context, there seems to be anundertone in the MCs words expressing a nostalgic eulogy to naïve dreams,desires, and values that, while not being abandoned, have had to be temperedand adapted to certain harsh realities they now face. Flex and Sha Prince are,for the most part, a very complementary pair of artists throughout the project.Flex endows The Antiheroes’ sound with a sense of stability in terms of rhyme pattern,flow structure, and smooth delivery while Sha Prince contributesunpredictability with intricate flows, harsher tones, and a gritty feel to hisverses. After listening to each artists’ lyrical content, particularly theirrespective interludes (Flex on track #8 and Sha Prince on track #13), it seemsthat despite both of them coming from difficult childhood upbringings, Flex isa bit more at peace with his past that Sha is. The difference in the places ontheir life journeys between the two artists, while the divide doesn’t seem tobe too big, makes for an interesting dichotomy throughout the project. It’shard to fault either MC for anything; both of the rappers are technicallyalmost perfect with their flows and their styles are well defined. To be nitpicky(and I am stretching for constructive criticisms here), Flex’s voice andpresence on the tracks can at times sound a bit monotonous from song to song(despite switching up his flows and rhyme structures). Sha Prince, on the otherhand, can occasionally go a bit far with the complexity of his flow structure,which can sometimes obstruct the vibe of the track. Most listeners may not putthis album on repeat and listen to all the minute details and technicalelements in the music, however I encourage them do so – if they are lovers ofhip hop, they will be hard-pressed to find anything to give this album flackfor. The Antiheroes have set the bar very high for themselves on their debutLP, and I hope that the world starts to take notice of the immense talent thatis embedded on the wax (or plastic or digital encoding) of this is freeDUMB.

FÜBBtastic Documentaries

2011-10-07T21:47:00.000-07:00

The following documentaries have been CERTIFIED DOPE by MC FÜBB for their ability to convey compelling and powerful perspectives on what is going on in the world (in alphabetical order):

Bowling for Columbine
Bus 174
Dear Zachary: A Letter to a Son About His Father
Deliver Us from Evil
Earthlings
Food, Inc.
Inside Job
Man on Wire
Pray the Devil Back to Hell
Shake Hands with the Devil
Taxi to the Darkside
The Cove
The End of America

This list is being edited on an ongoing basis. If you have a suggestion, please leave a comment.

An Angel

2011-10-06T20:21:00.001-07:00

Poetry

is a glorious angel.

It swoops down

with magnificent wings

and clasps a shrivelled old demon

between its strong, powerful arms;

a demon that is the world outside ofverse.

It carries the demon to the edge ofeternity

and back again.

The demon, still old,

feels young;

still shrivelled,

feels full of strength.

The powers of this angel

are boundless

and limited only by those

who don’t take the time

to visit it.

Though it is sometimes called poetry,

the angel has many names,

but prefers the name:

love.

Left to our own devices,

some may never find the power

of this divine angel called

poetry

in this lifetime.

Then we start to become

the demons,

but we need not fear,

for the angel inevitably

finds us.

FÜBBtastic Movies

2011-10-03T10:05:00.000-07:00

The following movies have been CERTIFIED DOPE by MC FÜBB (in alphabetical order, several start with "The"):

50/50
A Clockwork Orange
A History of Violence
A Nightmare on Elm Street
A Time to Kill
Alien
Aliens
American Beauty
American History X
Army of Darkness (Bruce Campbell FTW)
Audition (WARNING - extremely graphic/disturbing)
Austen Powers - International Man of Mystery
Batman
Batman Begins
Beetlejuice
Black Swan
Blazing Saddles
Blood Diamond
Blue Velvet
Boiler Room
Brazil
Carrie
Casino
Casino Royale
City of God
Cool Runnings
Defiance
Deliverance (dueling banjos anyone?)
District 9
Donnie Darko
Do the Right Thing
Drive
Dr. Strangelove or: How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Love the Bomb
Eastern Promises
Edward Scissorhands
Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind
E.T. the Extra-Terrestrial
Falling Down
Fargo
Fight Club
Forrest Gump
Full Metal Jacket
Ghostbusters
Glory
Goodfellas
Gran Torino
Groundhog Day
Half Baked
Halloween
Hotel Rwanda
Ichi the Killer (WARNING - extremely graphic/disturbing)
Inception
Indiana Jones and the Raiders of the Lost Ark
Inglourious Basterds
Ironman
I Saw the Devil (pretty violent and bloody)
Jacob's Ladder
Kill Bill Volume 1
Kill Bill Volume 2
King of the Ants
Let Me In (surprisingly great remake of "Let the Right One In")
Let the Right One In
Lock, Stock and Two Smoking Barrels
Life is Beautiful
Memento
Meet the Parents
Men Behind the Sun (aka Squadron 731) (WARNING - extremely graphic/disturbing)
Monty Python and the Holy Grail
Monty Python's Life of Brian
Monty Python`s The Meaning of Life
No Country for Old Men
Office Space
Oldboy
Old School
Pan's Labyrinth
Paths of Glory
Pet Sematary
Requiem for a Dream
Poltergeist
Poltergeist II: The Other Side (Mostly because of the creepy old man/poltergeist "Kane")
Predator
Psycho
Pulp Fiction
Repulsion
Raging Bull
Resevoir Dogs
Rosemary`s Baby
Rounders
Saving Private Ryan
Scarface
Schindler's List
Seven (aka Se7en)
Sin City
Sleepers
Snatch
Spiderman 2
Star Trek
Star Wars Episode IV: A New Hope
Star Wars Episode V: The Empire Strikes Back
Star Wars Episode VI: Return of the Jedi
Straw Dogs
Taxi Driver
The Big Lebowski
The Client
The Constant Gardener
The Dark Knight
The Departed
The Devil's Backbone
The Evil Dead
The Evil Dead II
The Exorcist
The Fly
The Fugitive
The Godfather
The Godfather Part II
The Hurt Locker
The Lord of the Rings: The Fellowship of the Ring
The Lord of the Rings: The Two Towers
The Lord of the Rings: The Return of the King (except for the super-long lame ending)
The Matrix
The NeverEnding Story (word to Falcore!)
The Pianist
The Shawshank Redemption
The Shining
The Silence of the Lambs (Hello, Clarice...)
The Sixth Sense
The Social Network
The Tenant
The Texas Chainsaw Massacre
The Thing
The Town
The Usual Suspects
The Warriors
Traffic
Trainspotting
Twins
Unforgiven
V for Vendetta
Who Framed Roger Rabbit
X-Men: First Class

This list is being edited on an ongoing basis. If you have a suggestion, please leave a comment. If you'd like some commentary on why any of these films made the list, just ask!

FÜBBtastic TV Shows

2011-10-03T00:13:00.000-07:00

The following television shows have been CERTIFIED DOPE by MC FÜBB (in alphabetical order...a lot of them start with "The"):

American Horror Story
Band of Brothers
Boardwalk Empire
Breaking Bad
Curb Your Enthusiasm
Dexter
Family Guy
Game of Thrones
Mad Men
Oz
Seinfeld
Sons of Anarchy
Star Trek: The Next Generation
The Colbert Report
The Daily Show
The Fresh Prince of Bel-Air
The Pacific
The Simpsons
The Sopranos
The Walking Dead
The Wire
The X-Files

This list is being edited on an ongoing basis. If you have a suggestion, please leave a comment.

Rhyme Scheme

2011-09-29T10:12:00.000-07:00

the city sleeping onme, though they give me daps

same headz too broketo cop an album are - quick to cop a dime-sack

catch me in the Cypherwhere the rhymes at

headz is sittin behindcomputer screens

toking on greens

hoping on schemes

I’m steady pushingproduct to fiends

I ain’t talkin’ boutrocks, I tell ‘em go for their dreams

they lusting fame andfortune it seems

with no plans, it’sobscene

caught up in their ownworld but neglecting the scene

yo Shiltz, hold me backbefore I knock someone’s dome clean offa

they’re neck, make ‘emall disappear – Jimmy Hoffa

call this calculated,premeditated manslaughter

I offered

my right hand extendedto build, from the ground up

now it seems I gottashut ‘em up, turn my sound up

too many weeds up inthe game, we be the Round Up

spray ya’ll with lightuntil the hype surrounds us

MC FÜBB bust in yourface like jizm

FÜBB in your face,like graffiti, racism

taste wisdom

every time I spit, Ierase prisons

built around your soul,spit from church, like Mase didn’t

Injecting dope foryour soul, taste the IV
drip, kats ain’t equipped, Royce check they ID

you wanna walk awayunshaken, then don’t try me

24 bars laced up,check the rhyme scheme

F.E.A.R.

2011-09-24T01:23:00.000-07:00

I've been consumed by it.
I know what it looks like,
what it smells like,
what it tastes like.

I've had it stop me,
I've used it to stop others -
I've been fear.

Right here, right now,
I'm not afraid of anything...
I am free.

I've seen lives derailed, buzzing
on some Fuck Everything And Run;
supposedly grown men,
their inner children crying inside
and crying out into the world,
sublimated into rage.

Yeah, I've been that rage.

But right now,
right here,
thank G.O.D.,
I'm free.

Review/Shout-Outs from the UK for That's What She Said

2011-09-22T19:32:00.000-07:00

Big ups to the man Andy Carrington from the UK for posting about the new single, That's What She Said, and giving a brief review:

http://www.andycarrington.co.uk/#/mc-fubb-thats-what-she-said/4555651914

Album Review: Adam Bomb – Wasted Talent

2011-09-20T22:48:00.000-07:00

Up until recently, Toronto hip hopMC Adam Bomb (aka “The Legend”) was known mostly for his work in collaborationwith the group Empire. His contributions of hard-hitting punch-lines, wittylyricism, and raw delivery have garnered him a reputable name for himself,standing out even among his talented peers. With what seems to be a break-offfrom his involvement with Empire and joining the ranks of the newly form T-Dotsuper-group Freedom Writers, it’s no wonder that Bomb touches on his careerstruggles and transitions in outlook and focus on his solo album, Wasted Talent.

The Legend sets the tone of thisalbum – heavy, deep, and self-reflective – with the first track (and mypersonal favourite on the entire record), Wouldn’tUnderstand. Touching on his views of stardom, staying true to his craft,and ultimately the fallout with Empire, Adam Bomb elegantly paints a picture ofthe mental landscape in which he finds himself. The second verse of this trackparticularly stands out as it reveals the reasoning behind his recent careerchoices: “This one-man route’s new to me/wasn’t planned out yet it panned out beautifully/ hold up – before fans shoutmutiny/ and ask about the band, ask the band about unity.” It seems fromthese lines that while Bomb didn’t want to separate from the group, he found ithard to find agreement in career choices from his peers. He confirms hisreluctance and reasons for leaving as he spits: “hate to see the day when an ‘A’ substitutes an ‘E’ on the jewellery/but I refuse to keep waiting patient ‘till dudes agree.” Adam Bomb isclearly hungry and ambitious to pursue his career as an artist and push himselfmusically, and it seems he feels he wasn’t getting the same kind of dedication fromthe rest of the rest of the Empire crew. In the last verse, the artist revealsthe underlying motivation and the need he has to push himself forward in life,as he writes: “The problem is depression/the solution is constant positive progression.” Adam Bomb is an artist withan internal hunger and need to achieve and push his music out into the world,and it’s clear from the way he’s spitting on Wasted Talent that he’s ready to take on the world.

Cue to track #3, the title track ofthe album, where Bomb ferociously spits one of his first tracks released underthe Freedom Writers banner, laced over intense percussions and samples suppliedby Big Sproxx. While always one to inject a healthy dose of socially-consciouslyrics amidst his rugged and raw content, Legend has definitely taken his newaffiliation seriously, delivering some intelligent and harsh criticism of thepowers that be in capitalist society: “Unlessyou into serving they need/ I suggest you second-guess every word that youread/ they ain’t concerned if you bleed, they ain’t concerned if you breathe/they’re only concerned tryna feed their own personal greed/ and the succeed…”He also explains his rationale behind remaining an independent artist and notsigning to a label (as they are part of the same corrupt system that he’scriticizing): “I stay independent and getpaid independent/ ‘cause if I’m broke, ain’t nobody walking away with a check.”Bomb absolutely murders this track, and if anybody needed evidence that TheLegend hasn’t lost his touch – this trackis it (video below):

WastedTalent is a not a conceptually limited album, touching on a variety oftopics that Adam Bomb gives a proper treatment to. On track #4, Not Me, the MC puts a final nail in thecoffin of those trying to portray the façade of being “gangsters and killers”in their music despite having no street credibility. He dispels the illusionsof young lust feigning as love in track #6, RunningScared, addressing the issue of pregnancies out of wedlock and takingrunaway fathers down a notch with his insightful anecdotes. Let Me Down Easy (track #5), a songabout the complications of relationships and the heartaches of breakups, hassome banging production provided by Phat Tony. Hearing Bomb switch up from hisregular delivery over a smooth rhythmic beat to a rough, accusational tone overa busy, trumpet-filled instrumental, and back again, makes for a veryentertaining listen. Adam Bomb sums his cynical view on relationships well whenhe spits: “you only get left tryna treat a chick right.”

There’s no shortage of features andcollaborations on this album (tracks #7, #8, #10, #11, and #13). It’s nice tosee that Bomb still chose to include his Empire crew on the album, with Tekmanon track #7, The Balance, and morecrew members on track #10, Silly Rabbits(the second track on the album criticising the “tricks” that women can play onmen in relationships). Freedom Writers features definitely stand out on thealbum as well. Track #8, No More, is ahomage to Biggie Smalls with dope production supplied by Rich Kidd, awell-crafted verse by Freedom Writers member Tona, and a great attack on rappersnot holding their own weight in the game. WakeUp (track #13), featuring Freedom Writers members Frankie Payne and Theo3and produced by Big Sproxx, is another socially-conscious track, and is a greatteaser for upcoming FW projects, leaving the listener wanting to hear more. Anyonewho works somewhat of a dead-end job or simply is working just to pay the billsand is looking for an uplifting track and some motivation should put track #12,My People, on repeat (shout-outs toBig Sproxx for the lovely production). Video:

As the title of the album suggests,Adam Bomb likely wasn’t thinking too highly of himself at the time he put out Wasted Talent. The album cover shows TheLegend passed out/leaning on a toilet drunk with a bottle in his hand, and hetouches on his struggles with alcohol addiction a couple times throughout thealbum. While seeming to be down on himself and having a cynical and moroseattitude throughout the record, there is also a tone of determination and a bitof a paradigm shift occurring in the artists’ psyche. On Black Limoz (track #11, complete with hypnotic vocals by Monique),Bomb talks about the various factors in his life that he thinks are keeping himdown (lack of money, too much drinking, women, lack of professional appreciationfor his music, family issues, etc.). It’s clear that he’s hard on himself andreached a point of being fed up with the state of his life as he spits: “Iguess I’m not the man I’m supposed to be/ man, I’m supposed to be THE MAN!” Bombeven goes as far as expressing thoughts of being ready to die in the secondverse. Even within this track, however, the shift in Bomb’s perspective fromdowntrodden to focused and determined is evident, as he starts off saying he’s “givingup” and flips the script after the second verse, recalling all the people heknows who refuse to give up living despite their own struggles. The artistseems to find some much needed inspiration in the strength of the people in hislife, and as a result finds the strength in himself to keep on going: “I guessit ain’t as bad as it seems/ and I ain’t ready for these black limousines/please – I’m not giving up.”

There’s no doubt that Adam Bomb isan all-around powerhouse of an MC. His vocal presence on tracks is booming andhis voice is distinct. His flows are on point and his delivery is powerful. He’slyrically witty, with both socially conscious insights and punch-lines andwordplay that rank him with some of the best on the mic. After listening to Wasted Talent several times, I reallystarted rooting for the artist – he’s got an honest charisma, despite hissometimes blatant negativity, that makes the listener want him to win. Ifanything is lacking on this album, it’s perhaps a bit more of an explanation onthe artist’s part as to how he can overcome the struggle’s and adversity he’sfacing, which would give the listener a bit of hope as well. Adam Bomb is clearlyintelligent and keen enough to see the problems in the world around him andexpress them eloquently on wax. It’s my hope that The Legend can begin toarticulate his perspective on the solutions to the problems he perceives in theworld around him and in his own life on future releases. Keep on moving Bomb –we’re glad you’re not giving up.

The Cypher on CBC Radio1

2011-09-20T20:18:00.001-07:00

The Cypher on CBC Radio by mcfubb

MC FÜBB - Interview on CBC Radio 1 (Here and Now)

2011-09-20T20:09:00.000-07:00

MC FÜBB - Interview on CBC Radio 1 (Here and Now) by mcfubb

"What a thoughtful, intelligent young man!" -CBC Radio Host

Album Review: Promise - Awakening

2011-09-20T16:14:00.000-07:00

Get the album HERE.

For those who are thusfar unfamiliar with Promise, Awakeningis a good time to get familiar. Originally from Toronto, Promise moved to theUS in recent years and is currently being managed by Duck Down Music. Releasedin 2011, Promise’s most recent album, Awakening,is a musically rich and lyrically engaging listening experience.

Right from the get-go, the firsttrack on the album, The Wake, engulfsthe listener into the context in which Promise writes and pursues his life anda career as a rapper. Promise is a devout Christian, and he isn’t shy aboutmaking this fact known in his lyrics. Throughout the album, P touches on hisinternal conversations with God and how his spiritual connection and religious upbringinginfluence his life and the message in his songs. While Christian themes andreligious overtones may turn off some listeners, Promise is committed to staytrue to himself and his convictions and makes no apologies for keeping it realto his core values. More astute listeners won’t be taken back by Promise’slyrics – he manages to walk the fine line between delivering a conscious-mindedmessage and being preachy very well. Most of the time, he’s able to infuse hisspiritual beliefs into his music in an empowering and uplifting manner,encouraging his listeners to look at themselves, their lives, and encouragethem to be better people in the world. For those who are averse to hearingabout promises of a better afterlife/heaven, you may want to avoid track #4 (Hereafter).

Being a rapper and at the same timebeing religiously oriented makes for an interesting dichotomy that can be heardin Promise’s lyrics throughout the album. It’s often the case that rappers/MCsare expected to be egotistical and self-aggrandizing in their content, whichPromise does delicately at times, while at the same time striving to be humbleand giving the credit for his talents, skills, and blessings up to God (check track#2, Clark Kent). And make no mistake –Promise is not lacking in talent and rapping ability on the mic. His vocalpresence is strong and melodic, while his vocal tone and cadences come acrossas sincere and heart-felt. When it comes to flows, P definitely doesn’t followthe cookie-cutter approach that is all too prevalent in the world of rap music,and he isn’t afraid to change up his rhyme patterns quickly between bars.Having seen some of his live performances as well, I can safely say he’s an all-aroundgreat MC, and holds it down just as properly live as he does in the booth.

Lovers of Tupac Shakur’s song Changes should enjoy track #3 (Something Better), which melodically andlyrically seems to be a bit of a tribute to the late artist (albeit with a morereligious and less “thug life” message). There are an abundance of talentedvocalists on Awakening, which makesfor a very rich listening experience, and it would be hard to simply classifythe album as a “hip hop” record. Awakeningdefinitely fits into the “soul” category and, some may say, the “holy hip hop” category.I encourage listeners to give up their labels for this one, however, and simplysit back and take in the album (suffice it to say that it fits into the category of“good music”). For those looking for straight lyricism, punch-lines, andcreative flows, check out track #7, Against the Odds. With a contagious hook by Jhene Aiko and an in-depth look into the mind of theartist, this is easily one of the best tracks on the album (close second/possibly a tie goes to track #5, Everyone Knows feat. Tony Williams). Check some of thelyrics from Gonna Make It:

“Labels that I wanted to sign, would want to meshine, they don’t want me to rhyme, they want me to lie and sign posters/ I waslike, “you outta your mind?” so I had to decline, and now I’m just rapping tofind closure/ I know, when the sun shines it’s over/ compromise my art? no sir/if the sky don’t part, my hopes will help me to smile in the Dark Knight –Joker” –Promise

Another personal favourite track onthe album is #9, Somebody Else. FeaturingSlakah the Beatchild, this song has an excellent crowd-sing-along type choruswith a positive “be yourself” message and smooth production with some niceorgan/piano sounds. Followed up by another great track with heavy organ-ladeninstrumentation, Don’t is a powerfulsong about the dangers of making bad choices and the fallacy of victimhood (inthis case by blaming God) in such scenarios. The track’s hook and bridge, saturatedwhich distortion and synthetized sounds effects (reminiscent of Kanye West), canbe a bit overly abrasive at times, but works quite well in the songoverall. After this track, the album’s theme shifts focus into the empowermentof women (tracks #11, 12, 13), which is clearly a cause that Promise ispassionate about. Men trying to run game on women everywhere will probablydislike track #10, Down, becausePromise comes straight with the type of advice that cuts through all thebullshit that can often encapsulate dysfunctional relationships: “Just because he’s in you doesn’t mean he’s into you” and “When’s the last time your man said he lovedyou and in return wanted nothing from you? huh? huh? huh?” "Huh? huh? huh?" indeed! Kudos Promise.

While there are some definite gemson Awakening, there are also sometracks on this album that aren’t nearly as strong as the others. There aretimes when Promise falls into the trap of spitting recycled clichés, whichwouldn’t be so glaring if his lyricism didn’t shine so brilliantly at othertimes. The quality of the all the tracks in terms of production,mixing/mastering, and vocal performances is solid throughout the album. It’sjust that a few of the tracks on their own seem to be a bit weaker in terms oftheir overall vibe and the messages behind them. When taken as a cohesivewhole, however, the vast majority of the album flows quite well and the tracksfit together nicely.

The final track on the album, Skin Deep, which has a beautifulguitar-based melody, does a good job of summing up Promise’s mission in lifeand the overall theme of the album: “Butwhy me?/ I guess in a world that seems Godless it’s hard to be Godly/ so Godplease, give me words when I speak to help fix the worst that I see.” It’sclear that Promise is an artist who puts his heart and soul into his music,which is probably the main reason why he resounds so well with his listeners. Inan industry where most rappers seem to be out just for the green, not to mentiona world that seems to run on much less than values and principles, it’srefreshing and hopeful to know that there’s an artist like Promise out there,working, building, and creating art for the promise of a better tomorrow.

All lovers of GOOD MUSIC are encouraged to check out Promise's entire discography.
And read up on the artists HERE.

That's What She Said

2011-09-18T19:10:00.000-07:00

FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE

Sept. 18, 2011

FREE STREAM + DOWNLOAD: http://mcfubb.bandcamp.com/track/thats-what-she-said

DJ PACK: http://www.mcfubb.com/djs.php

"You spend too much time with your rhymes"

THAT’S WHAT SHE SAID!

"You don’t give me enough of your time"

THAT’S WHAT SHE SAID!

"And you ain’t really destined to shine"

THAT’S WHAT SHE SAID...

It’s hard to follow your dreams when people around you are trying their best to bring down and hold you back. That’s What She Said, the new single from NewBreedMC and MC FÜBB (Hip Hop Headz/H3, The Cypher, Revolutionary Times Records/RTR), addresses the challenge of staying true to yourself and committed to achieving your dreams despite what people around you might be saying. Over deep and engaging production by NTG (aka The Fresh Water Monster), NewBreed and FÜBB spit ferocious flows with honest lyrics touching on the internal struggles they face as artists and the inspiration they find within themselves to continue on their paths in the world. That’s What She Said is a new single off of NewBeedMC’s upcoming EP,The Fresh Water Playlist.

The Fresh Water Playlist EP

What's more satisfying that a tall glass of Fresh Water when you're thirsty? NewBreedMC understands that and is back with his second release, The Fresh Water Playlist, to quench the thirst of those deprived of real Hip Hop. Working exclusively with producer NTG Productions (The Fresh Water Monster), NewBreedMC has created the musical equivalent of osmosis, inspired by the miraculous life bearing powers that water holds in all its characteristics. NewBreedMC and NTG provide a thirst quenching brand of freshness that is essential to the survival of the true essence of Hip Hop. The project includes hit singles Blue Lights and Rubix Cubez and features guest appearances from the likes of MC FÜBB, Roach Uno, SeAn Prominent, and Relic. The Fresh Water Playlist is set to be released in October, 2011 is nothing short of pure hydrations for all who seek refreshment.

MC FÜBB

Rapping since the age of 15, MC FÜBB (pronounced "emcee foob") began taking his career as a hip hop MC seriously after graduating from the University of Toronto in the spring of 2009. In Sept. 2009 he dropped his debut EP Foundations and followed up with his Blue Collar Worker mixtape in May 2010. He is the founder of the Hip Hop Headz (H3) community with which he started the event THE CYPHER, where MCs/rappers come out to showcase their talents and skills. His first full length LP In the Face of No Agreement, a collaboration with Brampton producer Noyz, was released in April 2011 under his self-owned label Revolutionary Times Records (RTR). Whether laying down his poetic, intelligent, and intricate verses in the booth or just freestyling in a cypher, MC FÜBB brings a level of intensity and skill to be reckoned with in the world of hip hop.

That's What She Said FREE STREAM + DOWNLOAD: http://mcfubb.bandcamp.com/track/thats-what-she-said
That's What She Said DJ PACK: http://www.mcfubb.com/djs.php

NewBreedMC (@NewBreedMC): http://www.newbreedmcmusic.com/
MC FÜBB (@MCFUBB): http://www.mcfubb.com
NTG Productions (@NTGProductions): http://www.reverbnation.com/freshwaterMonster

For all media/booking inquiries, please contact: mcfubb@gmail.com

###

<p>&amp;lt;a href="http://mcfubb.bandcamp.com/track/thats-what-she-said"&amp;gt;That's What She Said by NewBreedMC feat. MC FÜBB&amp;lt;/a&amp;gt;</p>

Feet Don't Fail

2011-09-14T19:52:00.000-07:00

My feet hurt – knees weak, head heavy

but I won’t stop, muscle like a mustang Chevy

trudging on this path, though it doesn’t feel steady

I asked God for guidance, He told me I was ready

steady grinding, see I’m putting the work in

it’s hurting, these rappers just skin-deep like Jergens

nursing their wounds like a bottle of sorrow

already told you, I’m building for a better tomorrow

you can follow if you want but I’d rather that you stand with me

walk with me, talk with me, make a plan with me

but it’s evident, most kat’s are hesitant

getting out their comfort zone – something that they never did

no Foundations, they’re standing on some gelatine

ya’ll can keep faltering, man – I’ll keep getting in

doubters wanna try to assail me,

with their arrows impale me

I’m praying that my feet don’t fail me

HOOK:

Marching on this path, and I can’t turn back and-uh

I’M PRAYING THAT FEET DON’T FAIL ME

I’ve come too far now to back-track and-uh

I’M PRAYING THAT FEET DON’T FAIL ME

I’ma stay driven, living out my vision and-uh

I’M PRAYING THAT FEET DON’T FAIL ME

Cuz I ain’t gonna flop unless my feet stop, so-uh

I’M PRAYING THAT FEET DON’T FAIL ME

Feet don’t fail

spit scripts flipped like Christ-Bale

ya’ll need to get the fuck off my set!

the crusader with no cape or cowl

straight up like Simon Cowell

while most full of shit like Colin Powel

if you could see the motivation my steps

you’d understand I’m standing for the children that ain’ even took a breath yet

to leave a legacy for future generations

there’s destruction in stagnation so I focus on creation

elevation, I rise to overstand the situation

even though my feet are blistered and sore, I’m more patient

but not waiting for my destiny to come

the drum, I’m addicted to

the beat is the vehicle

the mic. is the conduit

speakers what I’m speaking through

as long as there’s a 5% chance that I’m reaching you

I’ll keep writing rhymes on the daily

knowing that I’ll prevail, see

believing that my feet won’t fail me

HOOK:

Marching on this path, and I can’t turn back and-uh

I’M PRAYING THAT FEET DON’T FAIL ME

I’ve come too far now to back-track and-uh

I’M PRAYING THAT FEET DON’T FAIL ME

I’ma stay driven, living out my vision and-uh

I’M PRAYING THAT FEET DON’T FAIL ME

Cuz I ain’t gonna flop unless my feet stop, so-uh

I’M PRAYING THAT FEET DON’T FAIL ME

Even when my head’s the heaviest, remember this

progress is almost never effortless

but struggling ain’t a requisite for gettin’ it

matter fact, forget that – I’m being it

what I wanna see in the world, I set free with it

the microphone that is, like a cyclone in the midst

of the biz of this rap shit,

respect I amass it

platinum not plastic

the status quo – surpassed it

so now I stand out like a Jew amongst Catholics

hip hop’s daily bread

I’m feeding what your soul’s needing

what’s been neglecting through years of mental inbreeding

you might have to rewind that, but let me explain:

your life’s an expression of where your mind’s at

my minds on gratitude

benevolence in my attitude

and transformation of the world; no it’s not a platitude

I’m on my track, you’d need a train to derail me

I’m focused and I promise that my feet won’t fail me

HOOK:

Marching on this path, and I can’t turn back and-uh

I’M PRAYING THAT FEET DON’T FAIL ME

I’ve come too far now to back-track and-uh

I’M PRAYING THAT FEET DON’T FAIL ME

I’ma stay driven, living out my vision and-uh

I’M PRAYING THAT FEET DON’T FAIL ME

Cuz I ain’t gonna flop unless my feet stop, so-uh

I’M PRAYING THAT FEET DON’T FAIL ME

When You've Seen Hell

2011-09-14T19:51:00.000-07:00

When you’ve seen hell, sometimes the world don’t seem as bright

sometimes you gotta look harder just to notice the light

when you’ve lived wrong for so long, it’s hard to live right

when you drift far from God, faith is hard to ignite

when you fall hard, sometimes it’s hard to get up again

when you’re consumed with yourself, it’s hard to find a friend

I’m speaking from experience, I’ve been down that road

and trust me, I can easily be an asshole

but I define myself by the principles I stand for

while most of these rap-fucks are gassed like an aerosol

like a bunch of lost-ducks, no-one’s taking care of ya’ll

this is Revelations dawg, I’m just preparing ya’ll

don’t look surprised when you think the armageddon’s come

I ain’t talking biblical, but history is cyclical

not a nation, one race, together indivisible

long as we don't acknowledge that, people will be miserable

Hook:

(When you’ve seen hell) Sometimes it changes everything

(When you’ve seen hell) your brain rearranges everything

(When you’ve seen hell) you lose sight of what once mattered

(When you’ve seen hell) cuz what matters in the present’s that you’re world got shattered

(When you’ve seen hell) it’s hard to see the world the same

(When you’ve seen hell) you realize that life is more than a game

(When you’ve seen hell) in the midst of it I felt I was worthless

(When you’ve seen hell) but I on the side of it I found my purpose

When you’ve walked through the pits of hell, understand

taken hold of your demons with your own two hands

something shifts in a man that’s not easily reversed

what’s worse, you start feeling like you’re damned or your cursed

at first, I thought I had it all in control

after supressing my soul long enough, it took its toll

found myself toking and drinking more

homicidal thinking more

constantly at war with myself and feeling raw

like my skin was ripped away and my flesh was laid bare

I woke to a world that didn’t care – left me gasping for air

getting closer to the end, losing breath

in front of me: jails, institutions and death

thank God I was shown another option to the left

I was told I had to climb steps

I did and never looked back

because the fact of the matter is that

I’m blessed to be alive, that’s why I spit it on the track

Hook:

(When you’ve seen hell) Sometimes it changes everything

(When you’ve seen hell) your brain rearranges everything

(When you’ve seen hell) you lose sight of what once mattered

(When you’ve seen hell) cuz what matters in the present’s that you’re world got shattered

(When you’ve seen hell) it’s hard to see the world the same

(When you’ve seen hell) you realize that life is more than a game

(When you’ve seen hell) in the midst of it I felt I was worthless

(When you’ve seen hell) but I on the side of it I found my purpose

You can’t see me

might see my flesh, but can’t see me

believe me, courage it takes just to be me

the spiritual essence is hidden behind where the flesh is

I’m a vessel though I realize I got a unique perspective

we don’t see things the way they are

we see things the way we are

and we are, whatever we make of ourselves

chasing after paper while we’re spiritually raping ourselves

like we want victory but don’t wanna take it ourselves

living contradictions and humanistic fallacies

I won’t, let my circumstances dictate my reality

cuz I define my life through my cognitive ability

you can do it too, most don’t want the responsibility

freedom is power and it’s like Ben Parker said

responsibility’s the access, most walking dead

the truth is palpable in my lyrics, thicker than corn-bread

I’ve seen hell and heaven and they’re both within my own head

Hook:

(When you’ve seen hell) Sometimes it changes everything

(When you’ve seen hell) your brain rearranges everything

(When you’ve seen hell) you lose sight of what once mattered

(When you’ve seen hell) cuz what matters in the present’s that you’re world got shattered

(When you’ve seen hell) it’s hard to see the world the same

(When you’ve seen hell) you realize that life is more than a game

(When you’ve seen hell) in the midst of it I felt I was worthless

(When you’ve seen hell) but I on the side of it I found my purpose

Dream (feat. Fenaxiz)

2011-09-14T19:34:00.000-07:00

Fenaxiz:

Truth is stranger than fiction, certain things I couldn't make up

But straight up, I'll try to paint a description

Of the pain that I'm living, my brush strokes are blood-soaked

The pad is my canvas, my model's the blunt smoke

I see through, tracing my journey through life

Early on, I learned snakes in your circle will bite

Because most wanna block your goals, but never walked the roads

You walked, it's always those who talk the most

So I stay on point with whoever I'm connected to

Pursuing my dreams with only a selected few

A child of tomorrow, I smile through the sorrow

With my eye on the sparrow, I'ma fly like an arrow

To hit all my targets, I'ma give it my hardest

Ignore the obstacles then get it regardless

Anything's possible, don't quit what you started

All praises due, can't forget where my heart is

HOOK:

They told us we should plan, told us we should scheme

they told us we should work but they told us not to dream

told us how to live, said we shouldn't cry

told us to conform, they told us to live a lie

told us we should all agree – but I don't

said to fall in line, but I'm saying that I won't

(cuz) I'm standing for something greater than we've ever been

so till the day I die I'll be living out my dream

dream, dream, living out my dream

until the day I die I'll be living out my dream

dream, dream, I gotta live my dream

until the day I die I'll be living out my dream

MC FÜBB:

My rhymes that pierce through facades of superficiality

through verses I'm creating my reality-

technicalities irrelevant

unseen the way I'm getting it

talk about the future but the past I'm not forgetting it

I used to think my art could be perfected

then I realized my eclecticness

was so diverse that in reality, there was no requisite

for what I'm doing in this world, being on the precipice

cuz every moment passed creates a genesis

of space to live into

the calling of these fiends, I won't give into

begin to - see the facts about myself that's keeping me limited

most don't wanna look at that shit

but I be living different than kids

ain't no fast food, I'm spittin' lyrics that'll stick to your ribs

most can't see how gifted it is

how mentally lifted it is

ripping and giving the truth, delivery the proof, of how prolific it is

set it, I check it, I rip it, I wreck it, I said it I'm not who you're guessing it is

rhythm attacking, I'm asking, how the fuck you gonna be messing with this?

HOOK:

They told us we should plan, told us we should scheme

they told us we should work but they told us not to dream

told us how to live, said we shouldn't cry

told us to conform, they told us to live a lie

told us we should all agree – but I don't

said to fall in line, but I'm saying that I won't

(cuz) I'm standing for something greater than we've ever been

so till the day I die I'll be living out my dream

dream, dream, living out my dream

until the day I die I'll be living out my dream

dream, dream, I gotta live my dream

until the day I die I'll be living out my dream

MC FÜBB:

feeling like we off course, and at the end of the rope

still committing Holocausts, I got the antidote

lyrically I'm poppin shots that hit you like a Molotov

even when I'm speaking from emotion I ain't coming soft

never been on top, so how I'm falling off?

I committed to this path now it's too late to call it off

life is a blessing, but it ain't always sweet like Hagen Daaz

every single demon that I ever faced inside, dawg I fought it off

everybody chasing green with speed like methamphetamine

half the population zoning out like they on Ketamine

peoples' wings clipped, it's bananas like a magazine

saturated numbness like it's kerosene and gasoline

matches in the left hand, right hand Vaseline

cuz people getting fucked like predators who be snatching teens

this is my perspective, you don't gotta follow after me

but if you standing with me, then you stand against catastrophe

HOOK:

They told us we should plan, told us we should scheme

they told us we should work but they told us not to dream

told us how to live, said we shouldn't cry

told us to conform, they told us to live a lie

told us we should all agree – but I don't

said to fall in line, but I'm saying that I won't

(cuz) I'm standing for something greater than we've ever been

so till the day I die I'll be living out my dream

dream, dream, living out my dream

until the day I die I'll be living out my dream

dream, dream, I gotta live my dream

until the day I die I'll be living out my dream

In the Face of No Agreement (ITFONA)

2011-09-14T19:28:00.000-07:00

How you gonna relate?

I’m living life without a second to waste

these dreams I gotta chase

spent enough years running in place

consequences I faced

I spit out the bitter taste

and on the other side of suffering I found God’s grace

sprayed like a can of mace in my life

and owned the fact that most the time, I created my strife

realization pain sharp like the tip of knife

like suddenly being thawed from being frozen in ice

forget the roll of dice

it’s a choice that I made

to never ever go back to that place where I stayed

statistically, I shoulda never seen this year

so realistically, I’m only moving forward from here

cuz it’s a gift to me that I can even breathe this air

here’s my gift to you, I hope that you’re receiving this prayer

and I ain’t holding back nothing

half of ya’ll that say you with me really need to stop frontin’

and if you with me then stand tall

otherwise don’t stand at all – come on

Hook:

In the Face of No Agreement

staying focused on what I believe in

at times I feel like I’m losing

I gotta keep moving – keep moving on

my aim’s to put a stain in the depths of your brain

so next time, instead of pulling that trigger, you act sane

I speak truth, get looks of disdain

cuz the facts are unsightly like piss-stains

they spit game

most of these kats, (yo) they spit lame

I’m tryna get your soul unchained

and that’s church

most people on earth try to prove they self-worth

not realizing they’re no better or worse

and that hurts

to an ego that’s designed to protect the self

but self-worth is a myth, that represses the self

thru hip hop I’m expressing myself

just professing the wealth

that God gave me

it’s not all gravy

most human beings are intellectually lazy

and wonder why life seems crazy

ya’ll amaze me

a moment of clarity like Jay-Z

or alcoholics when the past is ghost like rap clichés

we create life today, that’s what we say

so ya’ll can get with that, or get off the freeway

Hook:

In the Face of No Agreement

staying focused on what I believe in

at times I feel like I’m losing

I gotta keep moving – keep moving on

in the face of no agreement

feel like I’m bobbing and weaving

from deceiving thoughts and demons

staying focused on what I believe in

through the seasons I stay true my vision without a reason

thieving heathens try obstructing my path, I’m still breathing

the only real obstacles I face are in my own mind

externally the world is my oyster, a gold-mine

we can be run by it or own time

and Noyz came at the right time for this rhyme

so sublime

years past since smoking a dime – my mind’s clear

I ain’t running from nothing – I stand to face fear

world’s been waiting for me to appear, now I’m here

hip hop’s train of thought, yo I had to commandeer

I just peddle on this bike of life and God steers

eyes wide and I’m listening close with both ears

before I put pen to pad or I pick up the mic

I stay conscious of the fact that I’m reppin for life

you may or not think that’s significant

but my prolificness when I’m spittin it is strictly magnificent

we can create a future ya’ll can see with me

word is bond, whether or not you agree with me

Hook:

In the Face of No Agreement

staying focused on what I believe in

at times I feel like I’m losing

I gotta keep moving – keep moving on

From Where I Came

2011-09-14T19:26:00.000-07:00

If you knew what I went through in my formative years

you wouldn’t question my integrity, I’m more than sincere

from where I came: a life riddled with fear

not recognizing my own face when I looked in the mirror

drown my pain with the beer

more than likely drinking the straight liquor

quicker just to make my skin thicker, killing my liver

just so I could be confident enough to deliver

myself unto the world, I was born to be a giver

swimming against the river, so cold I’d start to shiver

shake quiver from withdrawals, I’d fall and try to figure

why some people got the whole pie and I can’t see a sliver

vision skewed, feeling blind

struggling to find, peace of mind

started giving them a piece of my mind

thesis reaching without preaching, teaching, featuring I’m

speaking in the nick of time, amongst the greatest of crimes

is self-repression, here’s the lesson, if you seek you will find

HOOK:

It’s not life if we only exist

what we spend our time resisting is bound to persist

there’s no mystery it’s

what I’ve learned from the strain and the pain

we make our rules or we play somebody else’s game

I’ve given up keeping score because nothing is fair

and despite that I had to find the reasons to care

because selfishness was loneliness that drove me insane

now I can never go back to the place from which I came

My awareness of the world was painful

knowing what I did and not acting was shameful

not being thankful

although I was eating, had shoes on my feet’n

there’s people starving in the streets’n their bellies ain’t full

lacking perspective I was also lacking clarity

focused on my pain, thinking no-one could compare to me

tried to numb it with the herbs and rum

drinking straight Appleton

and smoking blunts that changed the colour of my lungs

standing in front this ladder, staring at the bottom rung

with every step I fell 2 steps back, was feeling dumb

even worse, started thinking that my life wasn’t vital

like a curse, losing hope, started feeling suicidal

crushed by my depression, distrust like and infection

that was spreading through my system

fucked up beyond recognition

I thank God every day that I overcame that position

‘cause death of my old self meant that I gained a mission

HOOK:

It’s not life if we only exist

what we spend our time resisting is bound to persist

there’s no mystery it’s

what I’ve learned from the strain and the pain

we make our rules or we play somebody else’s game

I’ve given up keeping score because nothing is fair

and despite that I had to find the reasons to care

because selfishness was loneliness that drove me insane

now I can never go back to the place from which I came

Regardless of the circumstances we’ve got choices to make

the way I see it, I can choose either to give or to take

in every single situation, I can build and create

or I can destroy and employ mechanics of hate

where I was in my past, I didn't know that it could be

a different way because I just couldn’t see

I didn’t know I could be me

I didn’t know that I could choose to believe

a different life – nowadays I’m a different kind of free

I used to think in black and white, but I know that wasn’t right

because the world lives in shades of gray

that compose our everyday

I heard ‘em say: “perspective ain’t everything,” but it’s close so

we can either grow or decay

you see I had to stop burning all the herb and tobacco

put the plug in the jug so I could break my mental shackles

now I earnestly believe there’s no problem I can’t tackle

there’s no war anymore, because I won the only battle

HOOK:

It’s not life if we only exist

what we spend our time resisting is bound to persist

there’s no mystery it’s

what I’ve learned from the strain and the pain

we make our rules or we play somebody else’s game

I’ve given up keeping score because nothing is fair

and despite that I had to find the reasons to care

because selfishness was loneliness that drove me insane

now I can never go back to the place from which I came

60 Bars (You Ain't Hip Hop)

2011-09-14T19:24:00.000-07:00

You ain’t hip hop

You ain’t a rap-star

I see these specimens up close in a glass-jar

Ya’ll can fall back now, ya’ll can back off

half of ya’ll say you grinding, really just slack off

I make love to the beat – you suckas jack off

bust on the track like I’m busting a hymen

what you say you represent, most of ya’ll lying

I’m on some Yoda-Jedi-Zen shit, stop trying

Do or not, otherwise make excuses, I’m ruthless

and I’m a bad dentist to these cavity rappers

which means that I’ma leave ya’ll toothless

the booth is a sacred place that you can’t desecrate

emulate, what you see on TV then you hesitate

when it comes to surfaces I penetrate through lyricism

got my artistry way beyond empiricism

suckas MCs huddling, in a fear-position

rappers spit clichés about how they keep it real

but the fact is they only as authentic as the feel

that’s some wackness, my word is my bond – my integrity

while kats give their word like they’re drunk off the Hennessy

and forget what they said so it’s easily revealed

that their word don’t mean shit – splattered like bugs on windshields

rapper voodoo dolls: tell me how these pins-feel

claiming true but ya’ll never been-real

doing what ya massa-chooses/Massachusetts like you grew up in Springfield

that ain’t racial-epithet, your masta is your mental-set

that you don’t even know you have, hidden in the context

best that you consider this a bomb-threat

cuz ticking in the brain’s pain stuck without a faucet

people more repressed than gays in the closet

I hit ‘em, they like “yo FUBB stop it

you exposing way too much about how to make a profit”

like Black Thought said,

“rappers spittin nails into their own coffins”

in the danger zone now it’s too late for caution

fuck rappers claiming that they be the bosses

obviously bullshit, that’s what they facade is

I see their inauthenticities like blips on the radar

I choke ‘em from afar, similar to Darth Vader

breathing hard, they got the fear of man instead of God

like they bluffing on the river just praying for that card

to show up, I can’t front, sometimes life is hard

but we always got a choice of how we gonna respond

face it with a sober mind or choose to face it with the chron

despite, what’s going on

we create, right and wrong

our fates, are not drawn

we say, what’s true law

we pray, to the Koran

or with a bible recital or psalm

speak directly to God when I compose a song

that’s just the type of shit I’m on

love it or hate it I still state it

I already made it

motherfuckers tried to shit on my grave and desecrate it

I took the environment I found myself in and elevated

high pitched on the mic you can find me in the treble

people hate, but water tends to seek its own level

I keep climbing higher and some heads left to settle

though I offer metamorphosis to all these walking corpses-es

my third eye see walking dead, sixth sense reports the shit

blessed with perspective, through raps I portion it

instead of forcing my hand like an extortionist

fuck where your Porsches is

raw? of course it is

slaughter all these false prophets

leave this rap game looking like an orphanage

Book Review: A Year of Misanthropic Confessions by Andy Carrington

2011-09-14T15:33:00.000-07:00

Get the book HERE.

Reaching a level of content drunkenness, by myself, and writing about my day-to-day experiences is an attempt to calm my hatred after my late shifts have finished. It’s not really working in that sense, but it is at least a method for recollecting my thoughts. It allows me to scrape by in life with a small amount of dignity intact, despite belonging to the same group of species as a majority of the KNOB JOCKEYS currently living on this planet. –Andy Carrington, A Year of Misanthropic Confessions (pg. 21)

This being the second review I’m writing for Mr. Carrington, and seeing the title and cover of this book, I had a sense of what to expect before reading. Carrington’s writing may be hard to swallow for some, as it can be raw, crass, and at times unsparing in the use of “offensive” language. What makes his writing bearable and at times downright brilliant, however, is his keen sense of social insight and ability to explain his perspectives with the use of various literal and figurative devices.

The Introduction section of the book, aptly titled The Reason I Don’t Want to Get to Know You, displays the author’s ability to perceive and analyze social situations around him. Ultimately, his analyses leave him feeling more justified in being an introverted, self-proclaimed “recluse.” There is a strong cynical tone to Carrington’s writing, likely due to an unwavering sense of moral conviction within himself, coupled with a seeming inability to accept those around him who don’t meet his standards of moral conduct. As I read through this book, however, I began to wonder how much Carrington actually holds true to his own sense of morality, and how much he uses his self-righteousness to cover up his own social ineptitude and as an excuse for what seems to be untreated alcoholism. Regardless of what is actually going on within the psyche of the author, it makes for some bloody interesting reading.

In the first chapter, Hometowns Suck (The Pontefract Experience), Carrington beautifully articulates what “many might say” is “the root of [his] ‘problem’” (pg. 7). He explains the rampant alcohol abuse and violence in his hometown, where inflated egos abound and vagrancy is commonplace. While judging his environment harshly, Carrington admits that “most who know me may be saying that I’m hardly a sober, level-headed individual at the best (and worst) of times, but at least I do it within the confinement of my own home” (pg. 9). From the author’s perspective, he is entitled to self-righteousness because he limits the destructive capability of his own internal demons. While he may be prone to the same alcoholic tendencies as the people in his own community, Carrington seems to sublimate his rage into his writing, which may be what prevents him from going out and joining the masses in their raucous behaviours.

In subsequent chapters, Carrington touches on the topics of superficial relationships (Chapter 2), dealing with employment agencies/being unemployed and in poor health (Chapter 3), the butchering of the English language by modern-aged “text-speak” (Chapter 4), working as a bartender (Chapter 5), his hatred for non-drinkers (Chapter 7) and idiotic bar clichés by patrons (Chapter 9 – great chapter), relationships, intimacy, suffering, illness, betrayal and heartbreak (Chapter 10), covert racism (Chapter 11), hatred of “Eminem Fanboys” (Chapter 12 – kudos for the hip hop culture acknowledgement!), big chain coffee companies (Chapter 13) and “Star Wars Fanboys” (Chapter 14 – the original three ARE pretty good, Andy…haha…), to the difficulties he faces due to his anti-social and harshly judgmental tendencies in everyday life (Chapter 15).

Part of the reason that Carrington’s writing is so inflammatory may be that he doesn’t consider it particularly safe to be vocally self-expressed in his everyday life. As he writes in Chapter 5: “I sacrifice my freedom of speech by remaining silent in my line of work and supplying these people with what they need at the time of asking just so that I am able to get by on a week-to-week basis” (pg. 16).

A major strength of Carrington’s writing is his self-awareness of what many would consider subtle choices that actually have a huge impact on his life. In order to hold his job as a bartender and “get by” in society, he knows he can’t be a loose-cannon and express his thoughts openly. As a result, he takes his frustration out by drinking and writing. Carrington also infuses his writing with an abundance of dry humour and wit, for example: “But people are people; they’re everywhere I go. Aside from them, I actually quite like my job” (pg. 21). While appearing to loathe most people around him, not to mention his belief that the majority of human beings are “fucking PATHETIC” (pg. 17), the author at times conveys what fringes on an affinity for his knowledge of human nature, even if he has contempt for the dark sides of human nature itself.

Being a poet who writes largely in stream-of-consciousness, there are some hidden gems of great poetry within A Year of Misanthropic Confessions. When describing his experience of betrayal and heartbreak while at the same time suffering near-death encounters with Crohn’s Disease in Chapter 10, his poignant words shine through: “I just deteriorated into a shell” (pg. 26). Again, his sharp sense of self-awareness as to the formative experiences that helped shape his current perspectives is evident when he writes how the betrayal of a lover he trusted was “one of my main catalysts for now hating and distrusting a majority of the people whom I come into contact with on a daily basis” (pg. 27).

There’s no shortage of UK slang and curse-words in this book, many of which are quite amusing. Some notable, personal favourites are: “fuckwit” (pg. 10), “scrote” (pg. 8), “toffee-nosed twats” (pg. 16), and “knob jockeys” (pg. 21). One complaint I have about Carrington’s writing is the frequent use of the CAPS LOCK. While it may be effective if used infrequently, words and phrases being completely CAPS LOCKED occur often enough to become a little distracting and annoying to the reader. His words and tone would come across just as loud and perhaps clearer sans CAPS LOCK (we get it Andy…you’re PISSED OFF!).

While this is a review of the author’s work, I find it hard not to express my own opinions about the author himself, in an attempt to provide some context for readers and possibly even make a difference for Mr. Carrington. For all of Carrington’s intelligence, wit, and social insight, it’s evident from his writing that he has a few major failings. He is unforgiving of himself and others, causing tremendous resentments and hatred to build up inside him. He refuses to take responsibility for his alcoholism, thus preventing him from dealing with his underlying emotional/spiritual issues. Finally, and most obviously, he chooses mostly to focus on all that is wrong in the world around him, rather than actively seeking solutions to societal ills. Let me be clear: Carrington’s writing is in itself a great contribution to the world. He sheds light on a lot of the darkness in the world that people don’t want to look or at the very least are ignorant of. Awareness is the first step towards being able to address any issue. I would love to see him take a step further, and provide some of ideas in his writing as to how to remedy the problems he sees and create change in the world. It’s my personal belief, however, that these insights will not be forthcoming as long as he refuses to confront and take responsibility for his own personal demons.

I’d like to end this review with my favourite quote from the entire book (from Chapter 8: Big-Chain-Coffee-House-Drinkers). If you agree with me that this is brilliant writing, or if it even amuses you in the slightest, I highly recommend you go check out Andy Carrington’s entire repertoire and dish out the couple of dollars necessary to buy his books and support this writer (not mention there's some free downloads!):

“Yes, with their fake smiles and big cups containing the BLOOD OF A THOUSAND AFRICAN CHILDREN, you’ll find them in there at lunchtime and then again around five-ish discussing the best way of EATING THEIR BOSS’S DICK in a bid to get higher up the food chain” (pg. 31).